La Buena Vida

January White

2012-01-30T07:40:00.000-08:00

Last week, we planted some basil and chives in a little window planter--I planned to plant some paperwhites, actually, but couldn't find them anywhere. There's no snow here, but I was in desperate need of some green...some life...nevertheless.

I photographed these using my nifty fifty lens and some extension tubes, which tend to give a more "fuzzy" and ethereal look, which I usually don't particularly like, but fit my mood somehow this cold January morning. And then I came across this song, and laughed--because just yes, to all of it...painting the walls a lighter shade of blue and all :)

So let's press undo.
Rearrange the old and call it new-
January white.

Every calendar is playing the same old trick:
A year will disappear, replaced with counterfeit
But we'll never really mind.

'cause if nothing else, we're given a little time
To change the game, a chance to redefine
Everything we are,
In our January white.

This year is a sealed envelope,
A culmination of hopes,
The lottery result that we've been crossing fingers for.

We could paint our walls a lighter shade of blue,
Or we could pack our bags and change the entire view
To January white.

If nothing else, we're given a little time
To change the heart in which we change our minds;
Our hourglasses turn.

This year is a sealed envelope;
With apprehensive hope
We brace for anything.
I swear, I understand that nothing changes that,
The past will be the past,
But the future is brighter than any flashback.

Well, we could let our guards down a little easier this time,
We could trust that when there's joy, there's nothing dark behind.
In spite of history,
Hope is January white.

This year, we're starting over again
Letter openers in hand,
A chance to take a chance.
I swear, I understand that the past will be the past,
And nothing changes that,
But the future is brighter than any flashback.

Song Credit: January White by Sleeping At Last (listen to this song on Song Cloud)

Thursday Thoughts

2012-01-26T07:34:00.000-08:00

-Last night, after Lizzy finally went to sleep, I curled up with coffee spiked with whipped cream vodka and marshmallows, and watched Top Chef with Justin. I love that Justin watches Top Chef with me, even though it probably isn't in his top 5 list of favorite shows as it is mine. It was an excellent end to a crappy day.

-If you're wondering (and I'm sure you're not), my Top 5 List of Favorite TV Shows are as follows:
(1) Bones, (2) Top Chef, (3) The Closer, (4) Parenthood, (5) Fringe.

-I also now have the three major walls painted in the living room, which means the top of my agenda for today is putting everything BACK where it needs to go. The fourth wall and hallway (along with the floating shelves and such) will have to wait until Justin gets paid again, or possibly our tax return, but I'm okay with that.

-The other day, my sister-in-law Renee was over. Lizzy is very excited that Renee is pregnant and kept pointing to her belly and saying "Baby!" Renee asked Lizzy if she had a baby in her belly, and Lizzy very sternly said, "NO! Married first!" Yes, Lizzy, that is exactly right.

- Speaking of our tax return, we're hoping to use most of the money to put grass in the backyard, as well as to landscape the front a bit, and I'm excited. We have almost a quarter acre, but the backyard has been star thistle and GROSS since we moved in. We'll have to bring in dirt, and it will be a BIG project, but I am so excited at the thought of being able to play outside, in a fenced yard with my sweet girl this summer! I'm also excited about the different things we can do in the front! Of course, some major expense always seems to come up around tax time, so I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much...but that might be a lost cause.

-I made a version of this for dinner a few nights ago, and it was delicious. I'd never eaten orzo before! My version had tomatoes, spinach, chicken, black olives, and I meant to have feta, but apparently I was supposed to use my feta cheese by October 2011, so I nixed that idea and added some very finely grated cheddar instead.

Source: foodformyfamily.com via Meredith on Pinterest

-We've been getting up to do Insanity before Justin goes to work in the mornings. Usually, that means about 6am, but today it meant 5am...groan. Blech. Although, it is nice to be done working out, and sometimes done with Bible Study before Lizzy even wakes up (which fits in nicely with the Hello Mornings challenge that I'm doing and HIGHLY recommend! It's not a fun, easy, or enjoyable thing for me, but it does help me get more done!). I really need to take some before pictures for Insanity, but we're already four days in. Whoops.

-My real-life friend Maren is selling Valentine's Day Cards. They are super cute, AND she'll mail them for you. If you are in need, check her out!

Link up with Sar at Life of Love!

Also linking up to:

The One Where I Ramble

2012-01-25T14:00:00.000-08:00

The last couple of days have been all-around hard with Lizzy. On Sunday, Lizzy was throwing a temper tantrum at church. I sat her in a time-out, and she promptly dissolved into tears saying, "Belly hurting!" On that particular day, several of our family members happened to be out sick with the stomach flu, so I wasn't entirely sure whether she might be getting it too, or whether she was attempting to get out of her timeout early. I told her that if her belly was hurting, she could get out of her timeout and come sit on my lap, but that she could not go into nursery to play if her belly was hurting. She again said "Belly hurting!' and came to crawl on my lap, and stayed there for the rest of the service. She did seem rather wimpy.

Later that day, we came home and she was playing like usual. She ate like usual, and there wasn't another mention of 'belly hurting' at all. At some point later in the day, she received another time-out...and naturally, the first thing out of her mouth was "Mama! Belly hurting!" Needless to say, she stayed in that time-out.

I also thought that she had her two-year old molars already, but now I'm not so sure--she also keeps sticking her fingers waaaaayyyy back in her mouth and chewing, all the while saying that her mouth hurts and that she wants Motrin.

Last night, in the car with Ryan and Renee, Lizzy proclaimed that she wanted Motrin. I asked her if her mouth hurt, and she said no. I responded that we only take Motrin when something hurts to make us feel better. She quickly responded, "Mouth hurting!" But she has been rather needy and clingy lately, so despite the fact that I think she's just developed a taste for Motrin, I also don't think she's feeling in tip-top shape.

Anyway, Lizzy was being relatively good this morning and seemed to be feeling okay aside from a bit of a stuffy nose, so we headed to Bible Study. During each session, while the kids are in childcare, the leader gives us ten minutes. She puts on music, and everyone is quiet. We're free to write, read, pray, or just sit with no one touching us. Just last night, I was telling Justin that it is the highlight of my day, and that I was particularly looking forward to it after a rough night last night with Lizzy.

We got into the car, and Lizzy immediately started screaming and crying because she wanted her Bible and it was at home. I debated turning around to go get it, just to have a relatively quiet car ride, but decided that was probably a bad plan in the long run...rewarding negative behavior and all. So we continued on. I figured by the time we got to church, she'd have gotten distracted by the kid songs or something. Only, she didn't. She continued throwing a huge fit, screaming "I WANT BABY JESUS NOW!!!!!"

I put her in a time-out at church, and she continued to scream and cry and kick about how she wanted her Bible...which admittedly is kind of funny. I mean, my kid was sitting in a timeout because she wanted to read about Baby Jesus. I mean, really she was sitting in a timeout because she was screaming, yelling, kicking, not listening, and generally driving me crazy, but you know what I mean. It IS a little funny.

Anyway, after the timeout, we talked and she calmed down, and she asked to come sit with me in the study, which I told her was fine as long as she could be quiet. After a few minutes, she asked to go to nursery, so we went. I came back to the group for discussion. Shortly thereafter, we heard a kid crying, but the nursery is far enough away that we couldn't really tell whose kid it was. One of my friends went to go check on the kids and came back carrying a hysterical Lizzy. So much for the 10 minutes of quiet time.

I tried a number of different things to calm her down, but it just became apparent that it wasn't happening. She was chewing on her fingers again and saying "Ow! Ow!". I asked her if her mouth was hurting, and she said no, but was just crying and seemed miserable. I remembered the pediatrician telling me once that if I think she might be growing/teething/etc, to go ahead and give her a dose of Motrin even if I'm not sure. He said that it isn't going to hurt, but MIGHT help, which in his opinion is worth it if done occasionally. So, I told her we were going to leave and go get some Motrin. We went and got Logan, and I loaded them up in the car.

And y'all? Once they were all buckled in, Lizzy started sing-songing, "Lizzy being naugh-ty, Lizzy being naugh-ty. Lizzy make mama sad! Lizzy being naugh-ty!" And LAUGHING. It became apparent that even if she isn't feeling 100%, I had also just seriously gotten played. I was furious. And also trying not to cry. Because really, we're several days into this tightrope act of her legitimately not feeling good versus using saying that she's not feeling good in order to avoid doing something she doesn't want to do or avoid the consequences of her doing something naughty.

We were invited to my sister-in-laws for lunch, but I called and told her no. We came home, and I rocked Lizzy to sleep for a nap after lunch. I should be painting right now because our living room is still in complete disarray. I'll paint soon. But for now, I'm just tired, and I need a minute.

Big Old (Painting) Mess

2012-01-24T07:48:00.001-08:00

Our house is in a state of complete chaos...because I'm painting the living room. We'd picked up a ton of paint samples and taped them up to the wall, moving them around and checking them out in different light. Justin and I had differing favorites, but both also loved a third swatch by Glidden, which I was planning to see if I could have color matched to Behr. I've never used Glidden, but knew I liked Behr, so I figured why mess with a good thing. I had been holding off though because the nearest Home Depot is a bit of a trek from us, and it didn't seem worth it to drive out there just for paint--I'd wait til Justin got paid next, and we were out in that direction.

And then yesterday I was at Wal-Mart and remembered that Better Homes & Gardens has paint now, and it's made by Glidden. I had the swatch in my purse, so I headed to the counter, and sure enough, they could mix me up a gallon. I knew we could probably shuffle a few things around in our budget to make it work to buy one gallon and get started, so I went for it.

I'm not sure that I love it right now--it's definitely not quite as saturated of a blue as the photos I had for inspiration. But, it was definitely one of our favorites of the swatches when we saw it in all the different types of light and all the different walls (the wall on the right in the photo above seems to always be significantly darker than the rest of the room--probably because we don't have any overhead lights), so I'm pretty sure we'll like it once it's all painted and our stuff is back as usual. It's a lot less dreary and depressing than the gray (which my dad totally warned me about when we painted initially, but I didn't listen), so that's a plus.

Also, the paint is okay. I don't like it as much as Behr--it feels a little thinner, and I feel like I have to stir it more often while I'm painting. But, it's not a bad paint for the price point.

I've decided that painting when you have to shuffle around furniture, play kitchens, and a gazillion books is 856 times (rough estimate) more difficult than painting an empty house. I can't wait to be finished! In the meantime, I think we'll have a few Dora filled days around here.

PS- I mentioned that I want to do floating shelves on that wall as part of the wall gallery. Before, our floating shelves were espresso. They might still be usable, but got pretty banged up in the garage, so we may end up buying more anyway. If we do, would you buy white, or espresso? Our couches and bookshelves are espresso, but our desk (which the shelves will be above), a bench, the trim, and a few other pieces of furniture in this room are white...and then there's the hutch that is more cherry and doesn't match anything else in the room. Not sure which direction to go, and would love some advice.

Messy Mom Monday, Week 2

2012-01-23T06:00:00.000-08:00

I'm back for another edition of Messy Mom Monday...and my house is still messier than I'd like, which I think will probably sufficiently describe it for the next 16+ years. Anyway, today I thought I'd focus not so much on the actual messiness of our house, but another way that moms can be a little bit messy--emotionally and/or mentally:

1) J and I drove over to the city where my parents live on Saturday because I had a photo shoot of a banquet scheduled. So, I got all my stuff together, dragged out a pair of slacks that sort-of fit, and had Justin drop me off....only to realize that the banquet is next Saturday. All our communication clearly states the 28th, but for some reason, I had it in my head that it was the 21st. So that was awkward, showing up to the venue and talking to the front desk person, who clearly thought I was a dumb blonde idiot. And I felt like an idiot. I don't know what I was thinking, but I'm just SO GLAD that I was a week early instead of a week late. Still, at least we got to eat dinner and visit with my fam!

2) I'm still a little bit of a mess regarding the whole mystery bruise experience. Even though they clearly told me that they successfully removed all the skin cancer, any time I have a stomach ache, or get a bruise, or notice that a softball scar I've had since middle school has a bit of a purple-ish tint to it, I still have a hard time not thinking that it's cancer and that I'm going to die. I know it doesn't make sense, but it's just kind of weird and hard to go from months and months of worrying and being terrified, to one day being fine and not having to think about it anymore.

3) I've disabled anonymous comments on this blog. I had been allowing them because my parents, Justin, and a few other real-life friends who don't have blogs of their own comment every once in awhile, and I like hearing from them. However, after I was left a mean and snarky anonymous comment on my last post about Lizzy, I realized that the vast majority of anonymous comments I receive are either spam, or some sort of snarky/mean comment. All my friends and family should still be able to comment through Open ID, so I just see no reason for allowing the anonymous comments any more. ETA--The Open ID thing is a bit trickier than I thought, so I've just decided to enable comment moderation instead, for the time being. We'll see how that goes!

I wish I could say that the mean or negative comments are easy for me to brush off, but they aren't always, even though the support from my husband and others who know us in real life should easily trump one nasty comment. I KNOW it wasn't that big of a deal, but it still hurts a little.. It makes me sad, because I pride myself on being honest here, sharing the good and bad, the messy and otherwise.

It also makes me sad that as far as I can tell from the stats (because even when you post anonymously, it isn't completely anonymous), this wasn't a troll--this was someone who reads and visits fairly regularly. It makes me sad that that person, didn't just sign in and comment something like, 'Hey, when you tell stories about Lizzy talking, do you translate or paraphrase what she's saying? It sounds like she's saying a lot more than most 2 year old kids I know,'...because that's a question I'd be happy to answer.

You don't have to be nice to me, though it does hurt my feelings when you're not. You don't have to agree with me, or with everything that I write. But the messy truth is that I think that if you can't even stand behind the negative remarks you make, you probably already know that you're in the wrong. I really try avoid stooping to the level of the mean comments, but the messy truth is that in my opinion, if you resort to being an anonymous snark, that makes you a sucky person. Or maybe just someone who has some emotional messes yourself. I don't know. But, I do know that I'm willing to admit that I just don't want to deal with the anonymous snark anymore, so I'm not going to.

Thanks for letting me be real--messiness and all :) Have some messes of your own? Link up at Living in the Moment or Dude and Sweets!

{More evidence that I'm a mess mentally sometimes? I definitely just wrote "Licking in the Moment" Heh.}

Lizzy's Spreading Rumors.

2012-01-20T11:30:00.000-08:00

This morning, Lizzy saw me reading Katie's post about her sweet little baby #2. She pointed to Katie's belly and asked, "Baby in there?"

I told her yes, Katie has a baby in her belly.

"She married?" Lizzy asked. A few days ago, she asked me when she could have a baby in her belly, and I told her after she got married. Since then, she has been very interested in whether or not various people we know are married, and also who she could marry someday, and when.

"Yes baby, Katie is married."

"Oh. Sure!" Lizzy responded, and then went about playing while I finished up reading Katie's blog, leaving the longest comment ever, and then getting ready to take Lizzy to an assembly at church where the missionary that the school sponsors was coming to speak. Suddenly, I heard Lizzy screaming at the top of her lungs, "MY MAMA HAVING A BABY! YAY! LIZZY BIG SISTER! MY MAMA HAVING A BABY!"

My immediate thoughts were two-fold: (a) this is news to me, and (b) THIS should be really fun to explain over and over again at church...where my mother-in-law, father-in-law, and sister-in-law all work! Luckily, she quickly moved on to some other topic and the crisis was averted. But seriously...my kid is starting rumors here!

Thursday Thoughts

2012-01-19T08:53:00.000-08:00

{one}

I get my stitches out today. FINALLY. They are driving me crazy. Starting yesterday, they started to itch terribly and are getting red and a little painful. Most people I've consulted said it looks like they're just ready to come out rather than that they're infected...I hope the doctor agrees!

{two}

I'm excited to hopefully get back to some real exercise soon. I've been walking on the treadmill with some regularity since I had the stitches, but after years of playing competitive sports, walking just doesn't feel like a "real" workout to me--which is probably something I need to get over. I know intuitively that it should just be about moving my body in some way every day, but I really love to feel that burn and exhaustion of really killing myself.

{three}

I'm starting to get the D&R itch (decorating & renovating for any non-nesties out there). First of all, I definitely want to paint the living room...a light blue sort of like this:

Source: remodelaholic.com via Meredith on Pinterest

Or maybe this, though the paint color may be a little bright in this one:

Source: houseofturquoise.com via Meredith on Pinterest

I prefer Behr paint (or something that Behr will color match)--any suggestions? I also think I want to re-do our gallery wall to incorporate some floating shelves. My parents got us the most amazing wireless printer for Christmas, but it takes up a big portion of our computer desk (and even though it's wireless, the desk really is the best spot for it in our home). I was thinking that if we incorporated some shelves into our gallery wall, I might be able to find some cute hanging folders and/or boxes, they could help with the stray paper issue we're experiencing!

Source: centsationalgirl.com via Meredith on Pinterest

But as always...it's a juggle between all of the projects that I WANT to do (i.e. build a table, organize our spare room, organize the garage), and having the time and money to do them!

{four}

You may (or may not) have noticed that my blog was blacked out yesterday in protest against SOPA. You may be sick to death about hearing about SOPA (good--have you done something about it?), or you may be wondering why people online are having such a fit about a piece of legislation designed to stop online piracy. Here's the deal--the idea of stopping online piracy and copyright infringement is a good one. However, this particular piece of legislation is pretty poorly written with lots of holes, and the practical application for a good portion of the internet, including bloggers, is SCARY. I'm not suggesting that there shouldn't be a piece of legislation designed to combat piracy (in fact, there's been an alternative piece of legislation drawn up by my own Oregonian senator that, with some tweaks, might be a good alternative), I'm just suggesting that THIS particular piece of legislation is a bad one. This article "Everything you need to know about Congress' online piracy bills in one post" is an excellent recap.

Link up, over at Life of Love!

Book Review: What Women Fear by Angie Smith

2012-01-17T09:07:00.000-08:00

Source: dayspring.com via Meredith on Pinterest

From the back of the book: In What Women Fear acclaimed writer and speaker Angie Smith admits, "Fear is a major part of my testimony" as she talks openly about significant struggles she has experienced. Giving a voice to the problem, she says, "I truly believe every single one of us struggles with some type of fear, whether it's fear of flying for fear of being 'found out.' Maybe you don't worry about dying, but you get sick thinking about the fact that you might fail."

Instead of suggesting that those who love the Lord would never fear, Angie blends her own experiences with those of men and women throughout Scripture to help us start dealing more effectively with these true, human emotions.

Over the past few years, I've read quite a few books that approach fear and/or anxiety from a Biblical perspective. Anxiety and fear were something that I dealt with on a near daily basis while pregnant, and so I was desperately looking for a way to calm my mind and experience some peace. Then again, when I found out that I had skin cancer, my library list was filled with books that I hoped would help me through the situation.

Unfortunately, I felt like most of the books I chose essentially said either, 'Because of Jesus we just don't need to be afraid of earthly things' or 'God says not to fear--the end'...which is all well and good, but not so helpful when you're already in the midst of fear and/or anxiety. Thankfully, Angie Smith's book was different--just as the back of the book mentioned, Angie took an approach of saying that we are all going to experience fears, but that there are a lot of great examples in Scripture for how to deal with those fears while we're in the weeds.

And more than that....more importantly than that...Angie is real in her writing. I'm going to be blatantly honest here--sometimes when I'm reading books by Christian authors, I don't get a sense of authenticity. Sure, they may share about small difficulties or frustrations, but I do sometimes feel like I'm hearing from the illusion of a person rather than the real person. I know they're probably not perfect people in real life, but sometimes that's how it comes across on the page. It's a lot like what we talked about yesterday for Messy Mom Monday--Angie is willing to share not only what she has together, but also what she doesn't. She's candid about the parts of her life that are a little messy, and that in turn encouraged me (again) that I don't have to be perfect to be a woman after God's own heart.

Overall:

That said, one caveat that I hate saying, but sincerely hope Angie would understand if for some strange reason she ever came across this review-- if you're unfamiliar with Angie Smith, she has an amazing blog called Bring the Rain that was initially started after she and her husband found out that the daughter that she was pregnant with would not survive. As you might expect, Angie talks about her experience and her story in What Women Fear as well. Angie's writing about her daughter Audrey is beautiful, tragic, inspiring, and absolutely worth reading...but I probably couldn't have read it while I was pregnant. Heck, I couldn't even read fiction about pregnancy loss while I was pregnant, and HATED when I'd be deeply immersed in a book only to discover storyline about pregnancy loss (The Time Traveler's Wife, anyone?!), and often wished that someone would have included some sort of warning so that I could have made a better decision about whether or not to read a particular book at that particular time based on my own mental health. Maybe that's just me, but ever since then, I've tried to include such disclosures about books that I'm reading...so that's what I'm doing here. I hope you all understand.

Disclosure Statement: I paid for What Women Fear out of my own pocket, and did not receive any payment or perks for writing this review. As always, all opinions are my own.

Messy Mom Monday

2012-01-16T07:47:00.000-08:00

Brittany and Jess are hosting a new link-up called Messy Mom Monday--getting real about the fact that virtually no moms have it all together all the time, even though it may look like it sometimes. I'm not sure if I've ever told this story before on the blog or not, but not too long after Lizzy was born, I remember looking at some other moms that I knew and thinking, I just don't understand how they do it! Their homes were always spotless. They were always posting on Facebook about their from-scratch cooking, the many novels that they were reading, their great 10 mile run, the hilarious TV they were watching, AND the great Beth Moore studies that they were doing. And here I thought it was a good day if I got a shower.

And then when I was talking with a few of the moms one day, one of them mentioned that they had been hiring a high school girl to come clean their house. Another mentioned that she has her kids go to daycare one day a week, and that's when she does her long runs and cleans the house. Another told me that they just shove everything into their back bedroom anytime someone is coming over. It was like an epiphany to me--they aren't perfect, I just thought they were. It can be a lonely place to think that you're the only person who doesn't have it all together all the time, and that's what I think this link-up is all about...letting ourselves be real once in awhile, and hopefully letting others know that it is okay for them to be real too.

.............................................

Here's my sweet adorable girl this morning...she's on the couch watching Dora while I lay in bed and blog.

But let's back up and get a fuller picture of the room, no?

It's amazing what you can hide in photos.

Our laundry situation is out of control right now. I wasn't able to do laundry at all last week and hadn't done much the previous week either, so it was a little outrageous. We made some good progress this weekend, but left two loads on the couch yesterday morning ready to be folded after church...and then didn't end up back home until 10pm. So there they still sit...along with numerous other piles of laundry that need to be washed and sorted through.

The buffet is still a mess from Lizzy's birthday last week. And the photo that I took to show you? I have no idea what happened there, but it ended up looking like this:

And our spare bedroom? Oh my GOSH you guys...it has become the dumping ground lately for everything that we don't have a home for anywhere else. We desperately need to add some money in the budget for Rubbermaid containers to get this under control!

But, Justin only has a week or so left on his high-paying job site, and so I'm leery about actually spending that money instead of putting it in savings. I mean, I can always just shut the spare bedroom door.

Go link up with Jess or Brittany and share your Messy Mom Monday post with us!

A Letter to the Fashion Industry

2012-01-13T06:00:00.000-08:00

Dear Fashion Industry,

I'm not a fashion blogger. I'm not a particularly fashionable person. I'm fully aware that this letter of mine will probably fall of deaf ears...but I have to say it anyway:

I am beyond tired of the sizing inconsistencies
in women's clothing.

{The first three pairs of jeans are all Gap Long & Lean jeans in various sizes. You can see that the sizing is inconsistent among those three pairs of jeans alone. The back-most pair of jeans is a pair of Old Navy jeans for comparison. According to the sizing charts a size 12 pair of Old Navy jeans should be one inch smaller than the waist measurement of a size 14 Gap jeans, but in reality, they're the same. Just as another point of reference, the 10 longs are the oldest pair--probably from 2006.}

Can I please just say it again? I am beyond tired of the sizing inconsistencies in women's clothing. On several occasions lately, I've ordered the same pair of pants/jeans from the same company in the same size and same style but different colors, and found myself looking at two totally different sized pairs of pants.

Justin does not have this problem. He walks into a store, buys pants with a 33 inch waist, and miracle of all miracles, the waist measures 33 inches. I wish that were the case for women's clothing too--that there was at least some sort of consistency in sizing, both inner-brand and among different brands as well.

I'm tired of having to spend an inordinate amount of time in the dressing room trying on jeans--sometimes several different pairs of the same size because the measurements vary so much from pair to pair--to find a pair that fits. It is getting a little ridiculous.

And why? Some say it's a product of vanity sizing--that manufacturers label their clothes to be smaller than they really are, in hopes that women will buy more pants once they discover that they are a size 2 instead of a size 10. But if that were the case, wouldn't you expect more consistent sizing within one particular store or brand? Because if a woman is elated to be a size 2 rather than a 10, wouldn't it also stand to reason that she would likely be upset to grab a new pair in size 2 one day and discover that they don't fit?

There has got to be a better way. Is it really so crazy to want sizing to return to being a tool or guideline used to quickly select the clothing that is most likely to fit? I know it's not going to be perfect all the time. I don't expect it to be. I know there would probably be some variation from brand to brand..but surely we could aspire to do better than a sizing system that is virtually meaningless.

Am I the only one who feels this way?

Thursday Thoughts

2012-01-12T11:51:00.000-08:00

Because you KNOW we're way overdue for some snippets.

[one]

I'm feeling remarkably less-sore today. In fact, I think that after my allergy shot, I'm going to hit up the grocery store. I have a feeling I may very well regret this decision since it is a bag-your-own type place, but I'm going to do it anyway since I'd rather cuddle on the couch with Justin and watch Bones than go grocery shopping once he's home. Update: I did it. We're done and unpacked, and I'll be useless for the rest of the day. Ouch.

[two]

We've been following a new budget plan this month--it's a cross between Dave Ramsey and You Need A Budget (thank you Laura for the recommendation!). In a nutshell, we used to budget out all our set bills, and then say "okay, we have $XX left for everything else for the rest of the month." But then, when Justin needed new work pants or something, we'd say "Oh, we can't afford that," but then spend that same amount if not more on...I'm not even sure. Random stops at the Dollar Store. Junk. Now, we're budgeting every single penny, and in turn, we're using our money to buy more of the good stuff and less of the junk. Even better, we're actually holding regular money meetings--I'm convinced that communication was/is half the battle.

[three]

My post about how to use your 50mm lens as a makeshift macro was featured on BlogHer--yay! If you missed it the first time, be sure to check it out!

[four]

I'm feeling like I'm in a bit of a book slump again--Divergent, Matched, and Legend all came up for me at the library within the past couple weeks, and although they were all good, I feel like I've been reading nothing but teenage-distopian-love-stories lately. I need something new. Any suggestions?

[five]

Lizzy's at a little bit of a hard stage right now. It's just pouting and whining central. Case in point? The following conversation we just had:

Lizzy: Mama, I want Bible.

Me: Lizzy, we left it in the car. I'll get it for you after I unload the groceries.

Lizzy: Mammmaaaaa! I waaaaaannnnt Bible.

Me: I'll get it when I'm done.

Lizzy: Maaaammmaaaaa! I waaaaannnnntttt Biiiiiibbbbbblllleeeee!

I ignore her while unloading groceries.

Lizzy: Mamaaaaaaaaaa!!!! I waaaaaannnntttt Biiiible! Mama! Mama! Mama! Mama! Bible! Bible! I want Bible! I nneeeeeeeeedddd Bible! I love Jesus! I need Bible! Maaaaaaammmmmaaaa! Mama! Mama! Mama! Mama! Mama! Mama! Bible! Bible! I waaaaaannnnnnnttttt Bible!

Me: Lizzy, is that the nice way to ask for something?

Lizzy: No. Sorry mama. C'mere. I show you something. I waaaaaaannnnnnnnttttt gum.

You can link up your Thursday Thoughts over at Life of Love!

Rest & A Question About Naptime

2012-01-11T14:38:00.000-08:00

Today, a lot of the ladies from my mom's group started a new Bible Study (Becoming a Woman of Simplicity by Cynthia Heald). During the video, she commented about how it's not only the trivial that clutters our lives, but the important as well, and that it can be hard to be still...hard to stop. I almost laughed out loud.

See, normally when Lizzy is down for a nap, I run around trying to workout, shower, clean up the house, pay bills, etc. I often long for an excuse to just lay around reading books, browsing the internet, nap, catch up on DVR'ed tv shows, or just generally do nothing. In fact, not too long ago when Beth Anne (who I still think of as Blair, and probably always will) was sick with the flu, I think I told her on Twitter that I would love to be ordered by a doctor to stay in bed and do nothing (though I could do without the flu portion of things).

HA. HA. HA.

Since Friday, I've pretty much been ordered to do just that--rest.I'm not supposed to pick up Lizzy. I'm not really supposed to do housework...although I've broken that rule a couple of times to do dishes, and definitely hurt afterwards. I'm not supposed to exercise. I'm just supposed to lay here and read, nap, watch TV, and rest.

It's much harder than I thought it would be. For as much as I used to long for a whole week of doing nothing, I really had no idea how restless it would make me! But, I'm trying to be good and follow the rules, because other than the fact that I need to be good to my body and let it heal, I'm also sure that by next week when I'm back to go-go-going, I'll be craving those slow, quiet afternoons to read. And maybe I just need to find some sort of balance between the two--maybe one free pass each week to just read and relax during nap time rather than to achieve and accomplish.We'll see...I need to think on it some more.

I'd also love to hear from other moms--if you're home while your kiddo naps, what do you use that nap time for? Is that your time to clean the house? Is it your time to workout? Is it your time to read or take a nap? Your time to craft? To catch up on blogs? Let me please be very clear that I don't think any of those things are the "right" thing to do--I'm just curious how other moms use that time!

Letter to Lizzy- You're Two!

2012-01-10T06:00:00.000-08:00

Lizzy,

Today, you are officially two. Twenty-four months. Two YEARS old. We had family over for your second birthday party on Sunday afternoon, and you had a blast.

Your dad and I got you a kid-sized baby grand piano as your gift. Even though it was exactly the price that we had budgeted, we really debated about whether or not to get it for you since you already have a number of BIG toys, but this photo totally justified our decision for me. You LOVE it, and it warms my heart to hear you sing Jesus Loves Me and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star into the microphone at the top of your lungs!

I remember not long after you were born thinking ahead and wondering what our life would be like when you were two. In some ways, it's just as I imagined--you are spunky, talkative, hilarious, and sometimes an exhausting hand-full. You love music and books. You hate sleep. You want to read the story of baby Jesus being born every single night, and want a banana for breakfast every single morning. You desperately want to go to school like your older cousins, and I have to tell you that we're going to "school" when I take you to Toddlers in the Library just to placate you. :)

In other ways, it's a little different--at first, I imagined that we'd have another little baby, or that I'd at least be pregnant by the time you were two. Even though that part of our life isn't as I had originally anticipated, I'm just so stinking happy with where we are now. So blessed. You are the best, sweetest, smartest, most beautiful little girl to your dad and I...and we can't wait to see who you become as you continue to grow. I know you're going to be amazing.

Love you forever and for always,
Mom

{Hopefully} The Last Mystery Bruise Update

2012-01-09T06:00:00.000-08:00

So, Justin and I headed up to Portland last Thursday for the Moh's Procedure to remove my weird mystery bruise/skin cancer. I think I mentioned before that I had been terrified that I'd get up to Portland and that they'd tell me that it was everywhere and that they were unable to achieve clear margins--I'm happy to report that was not the case. After two rounds of the procedure, they came out to tell me that they got it all, and then had the plastic surgery fellow come to stitch me back up. The procedure itself wasn't that bad at all--I was completely numb the whole time, and only felt one instance where they cauterized the wound. And the whole OHSU staff was just amazing and incredible.

Afterwards, we headed out to The Cheesecake Factory (thank you Sara!) for our celebratory lunch/dinner...and unfortunately, we were both so hungry and scarfed down the food so fast that the only photo that really turned out was this one:

Before The Cheesecake Factory, we stopped by Target--I usually start a new prayer journal/blessings journal at the beginning of each calendar year, but I hadn't gotten one yet for 2012. This felt like a good opportunity--my New Year's Eve. In the car, I told Justin that this has been something that I worried and feared about for so long...it almost doesn't feel like it's over. I have to keep reminding myself that I don't have to worry about it anymore.

Later that night, we went out to dinner with my aunt and uncle. I was still stuffed, but enjoyed some French Onion Soup and an apple cider with a shot of cinnamon rum. I hadn't read the instructions that told me not to drink for five days. Whoops.

Lizzy was doing great with my parents, so we made the decision to stay Friday night as well and head back Saturday morning. We stopped at the outlet malls on the way home as well as Rice Hill--I have to admit though that I wasn't as impressed with it as when I was younger. The prices are kind of outrageous now!

It was kind of a hard car ride home--I'm really sore. Even though the spot itself isn't that big, I'm sore from my shoulder to my waist. The doctor did say that they went pretty deep, so that may be part of it. This next photo shows my stitches, so if you puke at the sight of stuff like that (MOM), don't look!

I'm *still* really sore...and I'm not supposed to pick Lizzy up at all for a week, which should pretty much be impossible. Justin fell asleep on the couch this afternoon (Sunday), and I'm already feeling a little overwhelmed about the next week just based on the time that he's been asleep. I guess it just feels like now that we're home, we're jumping right back into everything, but I just don't feel physically ready to do that yet. I'm not ready for the night meetings and nights away from home for Justin--I'm not even sure how I'm going to hold up just during the DAYS while he's at work! At least Monday and Wednesday should be okay during the day--I watch Logan, which is a *blessing* because it means that Logan and Lizzy will play and (hopefully) I'll be able to rest a bit more. Still, it feels kinda obnoxious to be complaining about being sore, tired, or jealous that Justin is napping and I'm not--the major thing is that the skin cancer is gone!

One more little story--the night before the procedure, in my prayer journal I copied down the words to "Blessed Be Your Name" by Tree 63. It was my prayer that whatever the outcome, I'd still be able to claim in my heart that God is good. I sang the song in my head the whole time they did the procedure to calm myself down. And then today when I got to church? Guess what song we sang as our hymn of praise? Blessed Be Your Name. No one (not even Justin) knew that was the song that had been getting me through the last couple of days. Sure did feel like a God-thing to me...

Tall Girl Problems

2012-01-05T08:36:00.000-08:00

We're Portland-bound today. My little surgery/procedure is tomorrow morning at 8:45am. A couple of people have asked what they can pray for, and the answer is (a) my sanity and (b) that they're able to achieve clear margins.

It would be SUPER amazing if we went up there and they said that they had got it all on the first shot, but I'm not holding out too much hope for that. I'm pretty stressed about it honestly, but trying not to think about it too much. So, instead, I thought I'd post some of these "tall girl problems" that I found on Pinterest, because they're hilarious and totally true, even though they use my least favorite font in the whole world.

Source: tall-girl-problems.tumblr.com via Meredith on Pinterest

Things That Make No Sense--Volume 1

2012-01-04T09:29:00.000-08:00

I've been noticing that with increasing frequency, the Kindle version of books cost more than the paperback version. Here's a sampling of books that I looked up on Amazon today:

Her Fearful Symmetry (Audrey Niffengger): Paperback $5.42/ Kindle $11.99

The Other Boleyn Girl (Philippa Greggory): Paperback $10.88/ Kindle $12.99

Bossypants (Tina Fey): Paperback $10.87/ Kindle $12.99

The Help (Kathryn Stockett): Paperback $8.99/ Kindle $9.99

One Upon A Time There Was You (Elizabeth Berg): Paperback $10.20/ Kindle $11.99

The Day I Ate Whatever I Wanted (Elizabeth Berg): Paperback $10.20/ Kindle $11.99

I Am the Messenger (Marcus Zuzak): Paperback $8.79/ Kindle $9.99

Sarah’s Key (Tatiana de Rosnay): Paperback $8.93/ Kindle $9.99

To me, this makes no sense--there are no printing costs associated with a Kindle version, so what could possibly justify charging more for a digital file than is charged for the paperback version, which requires paper, ink, etc?! I have yet to see a reasonable explanation for this phenomenon, and until I do, I REFUSE to purchase Kindle versions of books that are priced higher than their paperback versions. Take that. But seriously, isn't this a little bit laughable? It just plain old doesn't make sense.

Snippets

2012-01-03T09:10:00.000-08:00

- The Ducks won the Rose Bowl for the first time since 1917 (I think) yesterday! Quack Quack! We had some friends and family over to watch the game, and I'm so glad we did. It was just a fun, stress-free day. And I so welcome staying busy this week, because it gives me less time to sit and let my mind wander to our trip to Portland at the end of the week.

-Speaking of the trip to Portland, I had a full-blown anxiety attack on New Year's Eve. It came out of nowhere. We were laying in bed, about to go to sleep, and all of a sudden, my heart was racing and I could hardly breathe. Suddenly, I was absolutely petrified that we'll get up to Portland for the procedure on Friday, and the doctor will tell me that my skin cancer is incredibly advanced, and that I'm like the one person in the world to which it has actually metastasized and that the prognosis is terrible. I have no reason to think this is the case...everything my doctor has told me has indicated and demonstrated that the exact opposite is true. And in my logical part of my brain, I know that. But the unknown is scary, and my brain starts following terrible trains of thought--You're already in an incredibly small percentage of people who have this type of skin cancer. What makes you think you won't be one of the small percentage of those for whom it is deadly?

It makes me mad. Mad that I'm spending the time worrying about it. Mad that I can't get the thought out of my head even though I KNOW worrying about it now won't do anything to prevent or change it if that is in fact the case. Logically, I *know* that it is pointless to worry until/unless I am explicitly given a reason to worry. But sometimes, it's hard not to be a little scared of the unknown. So, on New Years Eve, I just laid in bed singing songs in my head, and eventually fell asleep.

- Before the anxiety attack, the band spent New Year's Eve playing a concert for Celebrate Recovery. It was a ton of fun! Here's a video re-cap (shot with a point and shoot camera, so the quality isn't perfect). The first song in the mash-up is one of the ones that I sing in my head when I start to feel that fear/anxiety creep into my mind. It's called "Give Me Peace" and the chorus goes: Give me peace, I am weary with no rest. Give strength to my weary hands in this mess. Take a listen if you wish--in the second song of the mash-up, you can even hear J sing!

-In fun Portland news though, my former-sort-of-roommate Sara sent J and I a gift certificate for The Cheesecake Factory, which I am REALLY excited about! She and Lisa have been spoiling me rotten these past couple of months! Can you believe I've never eaten at The Cheesecake Factory before? What's good?

What I Read in 2011

2012-01-03T06:00:00.000-08:00

I can't believe I read 51 books in 2011. Holy COW. Rocking Lizzy to sleep for her naps has done wonders for my reading time! You know, it's interesting--last year I read only 26 books, but once I identified my favorites, they represented roughly 30% of the total. This year? We're at just about the same percentage. Is that weird or what?! Anyway, my favorites are in bold below. And I'd love it if you'd tell ME your favorite book that you read in 2011!

#1- Voyager by Diana Gabaldon
#2- The Unnamed by Joshua Ferris
#3- The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson
#4- Master Your Metabolism by Jillian Michaels
#5- The Story Jar by Deborah Bedford, Angela Elwell Hunt, and Robin Lee Hatcher
#6- Drums of Autumn by Diana Gabaldon
#7-The Girl Who Played With Fire by Stieg Larsson
#8- Heaven Is For Real by Todd Burpo
#9- The Freak Observer by Blythe Woolston
#10- The Girl Who Kicked The Hornet's Nest by Stieg Larsson
#11- The Last Time I Saw You by Elizabeth Berg
#12-Under the Dome by Stephen King
#13- Midwives by Chris Bohjalian
#14- The Fiery Cross by Diana Gabaldon
#15- Posh by Lucy Jackson
#16- Rescue by Anita Shreve
#17- A Jane Austen Education by William Deresiewicz
#18- The Fates Will Find Their Way by Hannah Pittard
#19- Little Bee by Chris Cleave
#20- If I Stay by Gayle Forman
#21- Man of My Dreams by Curtis Sittenfeld
#22- A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness
#23- Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen
#24- Belong to Me by Marisa de los Santos
#25- What Happened To Goodbye by Sarah Dessen
#26- A Breath of Snow and Ashes by Diana Gabaldon
#27-Uglies by Scott Westerfeld
#28-The Kid by Sapphire
#29- Pretties by Scott Westerfeld
#30-The Girl Who Fell From The Sky by Heidi Durrow
#31- These Things Hidden by Heather Gudenkauf
#32- Room by Emma Donoghue
#33- Bitter in the Mouth by Monique Truong
#34- Slow Love by Dominique Browning
#35-An Echo in the Bone by Diana Gabaldon
#36- The Year of the Flood by Margaret Atwood
#37- 31 Days to Clean- Having a Martha House the Mary Way by Sarah Mae
#38-The Bake-Off by Beth Kendrick
#39- The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
#40-Food Rules by Michael Pollan
#41 Sweethearts by Sara Zarr
#42- Friendship Bread by Darien Gee
#43-Dogs of Babel by Carolyn Parkhurst
#44-Love at First Bark by Julie Klam
#45- In the Woods by Tana French
#46- The Likeness by Tana French
#47-Faithful Place by Tana French
#48-Little Face by Sophie Hannah
#49-Girls in White Dresses by Jennifer Close
#50- Matched by Allyson Condie
#51- Divergent by Veronica Roth

And here's my list from 2010:

#1- A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving
#2- The Weight of Water by Anita Shreve
#3- The Myth of You and Me by Leah Stewart
#4- The Pilot's Wife by Anita Shreve
#5- Talk Before Sleep By Elizabeth Berg
#6- The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingslover
#7- Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet by Jamie Ford
#8- The Book Thief by Markus Zusak
#9-Island of Lost Girls by Jennifer McMahon
#10- The Boy In The Striped Pajamas by John Boyne
#11- The Next Thing On My List by Jill Smolinski
#12- Blue Shoe by Anne Lamott
#13- The Help by Kathryn Stockett
#14- The Girls by Lori Lansens
#15-Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
#16- Her Fearful Symmetry by Audrey Niffenegger
#17- Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
#18- A Wedding in December by Anita Shreve
#19- Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins
#20 The Host by Stephenie Meyer
#21- Never Tell Our Business to Strangers: A Memoir by Jennifer Mascia
#22- Outlander by Diana Gabaldon
#23- Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins
#24- The Wednesday Sisters by Meg Waite Clayton
#25- Dragonfly In Amber by Diana Gabaldon
#26- Hector and the Search For Happiness by Fracois Lelord

DIY Knit Kindle Case {A Tutorial}

2012-01-02T06:00:00.000-08:00

So, I've been on the lookout for a case for my Kindle pretty much since it was given to me on my birthday back in August since it obviously isn't the best idea to have it just rattling around in my purse. However, I'm pretty ~~frugal~~ cheap, and had yet to find one that I liked but would also be willing to use my precious budgeted pennies on (more on that at a later date). So, I decided to make one over the weekend.

I knit a lined, envelope-style case using the Horizontal Herringbone stitch. Since it's a woven stitch, it tends to be a bit thicker than a lot of knit stitches, which I thought would lend itself to this project nicely. I also used the standard Red Heart yarn, but knit two strands together to make it a bit thicker. I cast on 22 stitches on size 13 needles. HOWEVER, please note that the newer Kindles/other e-Readers have different dimensions. The important thing is that you make your strip just slightly wider than your e-Reader, and twice as long plus 2-4inches. Here's some photos to show you scale:

Then, you need to decide if you want to line your case, and if so, where you want the lining to go. The scrap of fabric that I wanted to use wasn't long enough to span the entire knit surface, so I decided just to line where the Kindle would actually sit, and not the flap that folded over. Then, I just whip-stitched the fabric to the wrong side of my knit piece, using thread that was roughly the same color as my yarn. It doesn't have to be perfect by any means.

Once the fabric strip is tacked on where you'd like it, use a very large needle (I think this is an upholstery needle) to thread your yarn through the needle. Thread a much longer piece of yarn than you anticipate you need to sew up the sides, 'cause it's kind of a pain to get the yarn threaded.

Then, you'll just fold the knit piece so that you form a pocket deep enough to hold your e-Reader and stitch up the sides. I stitched my sides up in-side out (so the fabric was facing out rather than in). Once I stitched up both sides and tied off the ends, I just did a basic whip stitch around the fabric to clean things up a bit.

You can probably see that I chose to whip stitch around the entire edge on the left and right sides, but only around the fabric across the top. This pulled in the left and right edges a bit and created "tabs" of sorts for my buttons. I also whip stitched around the fabric only on the very front inner pocket. {If your fabric reaches the edge of your knit piece, I recommend whip stitching all the way around just for reinforcement and to make it look pretty.}

I decided that I wanted my buttons to be in the back--I was nervous about them resting on the screen itself. So, I just sewed a couple of buttons on the back. I didn't knit button-holes--I found it pretty easy just to slip the button through the knit stitch. BUT, keep in mind that if you line your knit piece all the way to the edges, you'll have to come up with some other way to fasten your buttons since there will be fabric in the way. I have no ideas there, but if anyone else does, let me know!

Finished, from the front:

2011: Year in Pictures

2011-12-30T08:33:00.000-08:00

{Highlights: Polar Bear Swim and Lizzy's Birthday!}

{Highlights: The band held a benefit concert and funded the local food bank, Lizzy really started to run and walk everywhere!}

{Highlights: J and I did Insanity with great results! Spring started to show its colors.}

{Highlights: We completed our first 5k! It didn't go how I planned, but I finished. Also, J worked out of town almost the whole month, which was not a highlight, but certainly a big part of the month. I also had my first newborn photo shoot for Emily's son, and discovered I love it.}

{Highlights: Got to work the Compassion International table at a Newsboys/Kutless concert, where I snuck up to the stage like I was supposed to be there and got some AWESOME photos. Kaitlin and Jesse came for a visit--Kait and I got a night to drink instead of always being the DD's.}

{Highlights: My little brother graduated from high school, I learned how to make cobbler in mason jars, Justin planned a fantastic anniversary surprise!}

{Highlights: 4th of July food extravaganza. We also picked like 25 pounds of blueberries!}

{Highlights: We went to the lake house in Idaho and met up with Lisa & Lars in Portland (Lisa was my college roommate, but now lives in Norway) on the way! Hiked Table Rock the day before we all got the stomach flu, and finally learned how to do beautiful backlit photos thanks to a contest sponsored by Lee Jeans!}

{Highlights: Our hutch re-do, and painting our kitchen cabinets white.}

{Highlights: Lizzy started to want to dress herself, family day at the pumpkin patch, and Lizzy-the-Bumblebee for Halloween!}

{Highlights: The band went to Mt. Shasta, CA for a gig, I blogged about it and learned what a small world it is! It turns out that fellow blogger Cara @ Whimsy Smitten was actually living with the band's drummer Mike--he is her step-father-in-law! Also, Kait and Jesse came back for a visit before Jesse deployed...seeing them is a highlight, the fact that Jess is deployed again is NOT.}

{Highlights: All things Christmas, including a surprise new laptop! Thank goodness for a busy time of year--it helped keep my mind off our upcoming trip to Portland to deal with recently diagnosed skin cancer. All the joy that the holidays brought really felt like it redeemed the month!}

Overall, it was a great year. There was definitely more good than bad, and blessings abounded! Still, with all that's happened in December with the skin cancer, I'm a little nervous to think about all that 2012 could and will bring--here's hoping that this time next year, we'll be looking back and smiling at the fact that we couldn't have even imagined all the blessings that were in store!

See {2010} and {2009}

My Top 5 Commercial Use Fonts

2011-12-29T12:09:00.000-08:00

Here's a random question for you--if you've designed your own header, blog buttons, etc, do you have a commercial license to use any and all fonts involved? What about fonts used for free digital downloads or in your own Etsy shop?

Are you scratching your head right now?

If you're unfamiliar with how font licensing works, here's how it goes in a nutshell:
All fonts, digital scrapbook paper, stock photos, Photoshop actions (and much more) are typically licensed either for personal or commercial use. If they're licensed for personal use, you're being told that you can use them for exactly that--your own personal use. Not in your etsy shop. Not in blog designs for other people. Often times, the licensing agreement will say that the font/action/digital scrapbook paper/stock photo cannot be used for ANY commercial purpose, including free digital downloads, fliers for events and/or blog buttons.

In order to use any of these items for advertising purposes and especially for any circumstance that may earn you income, you generally need to make sure that you have a commercial license for using these items.

Yikes right? I don't know about you, but any number of my older blog layouts had fonts from here, there, and everywhere...and I didn't really have any idea whether I was legally allowed to use them or not (or even that it was an issue). However, over the past year I've been trying really hard to make sure that everything I use on this blog is legal (and ethical) for me to use. So, in looking at which fonts to transfer over from my old laptop to my new one, I realized that since I often didn't know whether a font was available for commercial use or not, I needed to start fresh, with only fonts that were free for commercial use.

Enter Font Squirrel (who I heard about from the wonderful John & Sherry at Young House Love awhile ago). I have no affiliation with Font Squirrel at all...other than the fact that I use them all the time now because they offer a HUGE selection of fonts that are all 100% free for commercial use.

Here are my Top 5 Favorite Font Squirrel fonts of the moment:

Seriously guys....if you don't use fonts with a commercial license already, think about it! Sure, you probably won't get caught for using a font without a commercial license in your blog header, but it's just good practice, and one less thing to think about or worry about down the line!

BQOTD: Are you inked?

2011-12-28T08:17:00.000-08:00

Today's Burning Question of the Day: Do you have any tattoos? If so, what and where? If not, why not?

Personally, I've always loved the look of tattoos, and would secretly love to be pretty heavily tattooed like some of the girls featured on Tattoo Tuesday over on Sometimes Sweet...I think the half sleeves are more often beautiful than not, but I'm not sure that I'm ~~cool enough~~ confident enough to be able to pull it off!

Justin and I have both talked about getting lizard tattoos for Lizzy (if you're scratching your head at this, we used to call Lizzy "Lizard" before she was born, and still occasionally do). Right now, this is what I have bookmarked:

Source: tattooique.com via Meredith on Pinterest

Something like this where two lizards form a heart, but smaller, and maybe on my inner arms/wrists.

So why not? For one, tattoos are expensive! They definitely fall into the "extravagant" category for us. Also, I always seem to think about it in the summer, but really should get tattooed in the winter to avoid the sun contact, at least initially. Lastly, I've actually looked through the portfolios of most of the local tattoo artists (there aren't many), and I just didn't love any of their portfolios, so I'm not sure that I'd want to be tattooed by them, you know?

But what about you?!

Snippets & Photos

2011-12-27T08:04:00.000-08:00

-Today, I'm updating my blog from the most amazing, incredible new laptop. Seriously. Justin, my parents, and my sister all went in on the laptop for Christmas, and I was just so surprised and blessed that there are hardly even words to describe it. The CPU is supposed to be super, super fast, and so I'm excited to try it out eventually for editing photos--I'm sure it will be MUCH faster than my old laptop!

-My parents also gave us a wireless Blue-Ray player, and we set it up yesterday, along with the Netflix free trial so that we could stream movies and stuff to the TV. Our internet connection sometimes seems a little slow, but it still feels so luxurious to be able to watch almost anything at the click of a button. One thing I don't have a handle on yet--what is the Instant Queue? Can't you basically watch everything that pops up on the TV instantly? Does it just load it all up for you so you don't get any loading/buffering?

-Photo Time!

My side of the family after our annual Christmas Eve dinner.

Me and my sister. Don't we look alike?! ;)

Our sweet girl woke up screaming at 4am Christmas morning. I'm not sure if she was confused about where we were, or just excited. But she was UP. My parents are usually up by 5am, so we headed to the kitchen not that long after. Lizzy was thrilled to get a "mocha" in a coffee cup like everyone else. She also loved the egg milk (aka egg nog).

Justin got decked out in Perry-the-Platypus stuff!

We headed back to our house around 11am. Lizzy was out like a light...thank goodness.

Then we headed to Justin's parents house for Christmas dinner. Payton and Logan also were decked out in Perry gear--clearly, Perry is a big hit in both sides of our family!

We had a great time at Justin's parents house too--it's always a crazy, busy, fun Christmas!

Yesterday, we mostly just hung out at home. I wanted to take our tree down, but that didn't happen. Oh well! Lizzy had a blast playing with some of her new toys, and it was pretty hilarious to see how she used them. For example, one of her aunts and uncles got her a Little Tikes car. She pushed it right in front of the TV, and created her very own drive-in!

I hope you guys had a great weekend!

BQOTD--Beating A Dead Horse (aka A Santa Post)

2011-12-22T08:23:00.000-08:00

I've seen about 100 blog posts this week with people taking what I think of in my head as a "Santa Stance"--explaining why they choose to do the whole Santa thing (or not). So, on one hand, I recognize that you all are probably feeling totally over this topic. But on the other hand, I just couldn't resist having this be my burning question of the day...I find the whole "Santa Debates" fascinating.

So, today's Burning Question of the Day is:

If you celebrate Christmas, do you/will you incorporate Santa into your Christmas traditions? If so, in what capacity? If not, why not?

(PS- If you've already posted about this on your blog, please feel free just to link us back there).

Week 2

2011-12-21T07:32:00.000-08:00

Fear is sneaky.

It comes in unexpected places.

Like, the book that I have been on the waiting list for at the library for months, only to finally receive and realize that it's about a mother with cancer, who I'm getting the impression will die.

Or the episode of The Closer two weeks ago--which Justin and I sat down to watch eager for some relief after finding out that the diagnosis was in fact skin cancer, only to realize that a major sub-story in that particular episode was Brenda's father being diagnosed with thyroid cancer.

It's in writing my monthly Letter to Lizzy, and the brief thought that appeared out of nowhere, "I wonder if I started doing these because I would die when Lizzy is young. I wonder if these will be the only thing she remembers me by."

Or, it's in having a stomach ache, and wondering if I ate something that didn't agree with me, or if the cancer is just more advanced than they knew.

The trouble is, that once that fear is there...it can be hard to banish. But sometime last week, I decided that my fear is just not going to encroach on the joy that this time of year brings. I just will not allow myself to linger on it. Thankfully, I can usually count on sleep to help, and to feel calm when I wake. Immersing myself in fiction also helps. Consequently, I'm doing a lot more sleeping and reading than cleaning house or making dinner lately. Our house is a disaster, but the trade-off (my mental health) has been well worth it.

Also, last week, my dermatologist spent over a half an hour on the phone, answering every question and concern that I had. Thank GOD for her. I remember finishing the conversation with her, and just feeling confident and at peace...but how quickly that confidence can be shaken! Even later that same day, I found myself worrying and doubting again. I wrote my questions and her answers down while we were speaking, but I'm the type of person that learns by writing. So, I'm going to type up some of my questions and her answers here, just so that the knowledge can sink even further into my bones and my soul. Also, I hope it will answer some of the questions that have been asked by all of you!

Me: As far as going to Portland for the surgery, was it just that the local doctor doesn't handle this type of skin cancer and/or that the hospital there was just more familiar with it? Not necessarily that it is a bad type of cancer, but just that it needed to be addressed quickly?
Dr: A little of both--the local doctor couldn't get you in until March, and it just can't wait that long. Also, the local doctor wanted you to have the procedure in Portland because DFSP is sometimes an iceberg--it can be bigger than you might think initially. I've actually seen cases of huge DFSP tumors quite often because I trained at Mayo Clinic, and sometimes it can be no big deal, but you never know for sure until you get in there.

Me: Is there any reason to worry or suspect that I may have more of these DFSP's elsewhere?
Dr: No. These come singly. I've never seen a case with more than one at once. Occasionally, they may come back right where they were, but not in groupings.

Me: Because of the small size, is it your guess that it was caught early?
Dr: What I could feel felt small. What I cut out felt about the size of a lima bean. I didn't feel more beneath that that seemed like DFSP, but it can occasionally send out tendrils, and the cancer cells were close to the edges of what I cut out, which is why we need to do the Moh's procedure, to make sure it is all gone.

Me: Are there any follow-ups to make sure that the clear margins were achieved with the Moh's procedure?
Dr: You'll come back every 4-6 months for several years. I have had a patient who had a recurrence of DFSP--she I could both feel it right away in her skin exam. You can usually see or feel recurrences. Moh's procedure gives the best protection against recurrence.

Me: So just to confirm, the prognosis is good?
Dr: Yes, as long as it is taken care of quickly.

Me: Before we found out about the DFSP, we had been talking about possibly having more kids. That's off the table for now, but would you be able to let us know when that's something that we could start discussing again?
Dr: As far as I'm concerned, you could be trying now. I don't think there would be any reason to worry if you became pregnant--it wouldn't affect your treatment, and the DFSP wouldn't affect a pregnancy.

The pregnancy talk is still tabled for the moment--I would just feel better waiting for now. At least until Portland is done. But, my doctor's comments that she would have no problem okaying us to start trying is helpful to me in putting this all into context. She must really consider the prognosis to be good if she was ready to okay trying to conceive.

Thank you guys so much for your thoughts, prayers, and encouragement. It means so much.

Snippets + Giveaway Winner

2011-12-20T09:05:00.000-08:00

-Justin and I got to go on a real "date" on Saturday night to his annual company Christmas party. Sorry for the crappy cell phone photo, but it was all we got! I had been stressing out a bit that morning about what to wear to the party, but in a stroke of perfect timing, Lisa had sent an early Christmas present that arrived that afternoon, which just happened to include a dress and beautiful necklace! Lizzy stayed with Ryan and Renee, and they texted us about 9 to tell us that she was asleep, and if we wanted, we could just pick her up in the morning. So we did. And she did fine. I'm glad we did that--it'll be one less thing for me to worry about when we go up to Portland next month.

-We took Lizzy to see Santa at the library yesterday. She went right up to him and said, "Hi Santa! Ho, ho Christmas! Happy birthday baby Jesus! I love cookies!" Santa and Mrs. Claus asked how old she was, and were very surprised that she wasn't two yet. Santa said that she has a "tremendous command of the English language." It made me smile.

-We also went to look at Christmas lights last night. I've mentioned before that Lizzy is still usually rear-facing, but we turned her around to forward facing just to go look at the lights. And I've gotta say--I'm excited to turn her around for real...she was so much more interactive with us in the car. She LOVED the lights. It was so much fun to hear her sing "Joy to the World" at the top of her lungs as we were looking.

Here's an interesting tidbit--the house above was listed for sale in Sept 2010 for $548,500. It sold in November for $359,500. Ouch. Looks like the real estate market here in Oregon is still hurting!

- Megan posted about this today on Facebook, and it is such an awesome deal (I bought one for when we go to Portland) that I thought I'd share. If you go to www.todayshowrestaurant.com and enter the code TodayRestaurant, you can get a $500 gift card to restaurant.com for $30. It's sponsored by the Today Show, and is up on their website as well.

-The winner of the Love Came Down Giveaway is:

Congrats! Hope you all have a great Tuesday!

Dare to Have Traditions

2011-12-19T08:57:00.000-08:00

Have you checked out the Dare to DIY feature over at NewlyWoodwards? Kim does an amazing job showcasing all sorts of different DIY things for the holidays, from cookies to decor. I had wanted to participate more often this year, but just wasn't able to between not having internet and everything else that's been going on. But this week? I was not going to miss. It's my favorite--Dare to Have Traditions.

My family has always joked about me and traditions. I think one year on Christmas morning, my dad picked up doughnuts at the store. The next year, when we didn't have doughnuts, I was appalled, saying, "But it's tradition!" And that's so true for me--if it happens once and I enjoy it, it's tradition!

So, here are a few of the Christmas traditions in our family:

The Christmas Pickle:

You can read more about the Christmas Pickle {here}, but essentially, we leave a pickle ornament out for Santa to hide, and whoever finds it first on Christmas morning gets an extra present from Santa (usually candy). A few weeks ago, I was telling Lizzy that her dad or her uncle Kevin usually are the ones who find the pickle. Now, every morning she'll get up, see the pickle on our tree, and yell "No Kevin! Lizzy's turn for pickle!"

Advent Books:

This is something new we've started, but I'd like it to become tradition! This year, we wrapped up 25 Christmas books (actually, we had 30, so we wrapped up 30 and started a little early), and Lizzy gets to open one each night. It's just a fun and inexpensive thing to do as a family.

Christmas Lights:

Justin doesn't actually know that this is going to be a tradition yet, but I would really like it to! There's a street about 15 minutes away from us that gets TOTALLY decked out with lights. Last year, on a night that we had a hard time getting Lizzy to go to sleep, we drove through while listening to Christmas music. I'd love to continue the tradition this year, but we'll see.

Christmas Eve- Christmas Day:

For the past 10 or 11 years, my family has gotten dressed up and gone to a fancy dinner on Christmas Eve at the same local restaurant. It is one of my favorite traditions by far, and I'm so glad that we've continued going since Justin and I have been married and Lizzy was born, even though it often keeps Lizzy up FAR past her bedtime and sometimes it's hard to do the fancy restaurant thing with a toddler.

{last year}

{2009}

I know a lot of people think that it's kind of odd to go out to eat on Christmas Eve, but we don't typically go out to nice dinners, so it's a big treat for our family to get dressed up, and then not only go out to eat, but order drinks, appetizers, and desserts in addition to dinner! There's just this extra kindness and excitement in the air as we all slow down from the hustle and bustle and eat dinner together.

After dinner, we usually spend the night at my parents' house and then open Christmas presents there with them in the morning (and we usually just take our stockings over). At some point, we head back to our house to open presents from each other and then relax a bit. Lizzy keeps asking me if we're going to have birthday cake for Jesus, so I might do a little something like that to do while we're at home too. This year, we've started doing four presents for Lizzy--something she wants, something she needs, something to wear, and something to read. Our family does do presents from Santa, and we hadn't really discussed the Santa gift as in the context of the four presents, so this year, one of those will probably just be her Santa present, and we'll reevaluate next year.

A little later, we head over to Justin's parents house, where we open presents with all of his sisters, brother, and kiddos. The adults draw names for a gift exchange, and everyone gets small presents for the kids. It's such a fun and LOUD time, even though it might be a little harder this year since one of the nieces will be with her dad for the first time on Christmas. It's good for her to be able to spend time with him, but we will still miss her! Later, we have a huge Christmas dinner. It's always so much fun.

We are so blessed.

Read Outlander. Now.

2011-12-16T08:32:00.000-08:00

{Don't you wish you knew where you could actually buy it for $3.99?!}

A little over a year ago, several people recommended that I read Outlander by Diana Gabaldon (not to be confused with the terrible movie or not-at-all-terrible vehicle by the same name). I immediately dismissed the suggestion because (a) I don't usually like sci-fi, time traveling stuff, (b) I don't usually love that period of historical fiction, and (c) I REALLY don't enjoy romance novels.

I know, I'm picky when it come to books.

Anyway, much to my surprise, Outlander kept being recommended to me, even by people whose taste in books I totally trusted. And so, sometime last winter, I requested the first book of the Outlander series from the library. And I have to admit--I spent much of the first book wondering 'what were they thinking?!' There was much of the book that I didn't agree with, or was just plain difficult to read. But somehow, by the end, I found myself loving it. Loving.

And then I requested the second book. And the third. And the fourth. And so on, all the way up to the last book that's been released (the seventh), and I'm desperately awaiting the next book to be released.

It's a little bit difficult to explain what's so infectious about these books, but I'm not sure I've come across anyone who didn't like at least the first one. I think it has something to do with the fact that Gabaldon creates characters that you genuinely come to care about--I know this is probably going to sound totally wackadoodle, but even now (a good six months since I read the last book), I sometimes find myself thinking "Oh, that's something Jamie would say," or "I wonder what Jamie would do?" And let's just be honest--I'm not usually into romance novels, but these were pretty hot.

Jamie and Claire felt like real people to me. Friends, even. And, I miss them.

Source: blackryptonite.tumblr.com via Meredith on Pinterest

(This quote is attributed to Paul Sweeney)

I know some people (like my husband) can re-read books over and over again. Not me. I can count on one hand the number of fiction books that I've re-read in my life. In fact, there are four--To Kill A Mockingbird, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, 1984, and Outlander. And of those, NEVER before have I come across a book that I love so much that I'll just pick it up and read a random passage. But I find myself doing that often with Outlander. In fact, I'm considering re-reading the entire stinking series. That's how much I loved it.

I know they're big books, but they FLY by. And if you're not sure that you're ready to commit to reading seven books, know that you could stop after the third book (Voyager), and it would feel like you were at a point of resolution. Seriously, if you love to read, you have to give this series a shot.

Have you read it yet?

Aftermath.

2011-12-15T06:00:00.000-08:00

I had a complete ugly-cry breakdown on Tuesday afternoon. I was at a birthday breakfast for two of my sisters-in-law Tuesday morning when I got a call that the local surgeon does not handle this type of skin cancer and that I would have to go to Portland for the procedure (it's scheduled for January 6th).

It felt like nothing was going right...and if nothing was going right now, how could it possibly be okay in the end?! I freaked.

I think that one of the things that was helping me stay relatively calm was being able to tell myself that it was just a basic in-office procedure that could be done here locally, and no big deal. I'd be home in my own bed that night. But then when I was told it had to be in Portland, suddenly we were talking cancer centers, big teaching hospitals, making arrangements to leave Lizzy overnight (which we haven't done yet), arranging for Justin to get time off work--unpaid, as his work no longer gives vacation or sick time. It meant being given info for patient advocates, The American Cancer Society, and places that give assistance for medical-related travel expenses. It meant calling places and saying, "Hi, I'm Meredith, and I have an extremely unusual form of skin cancer and I need to _______." It meant letters from my dermatologist, which she said were meant not to freak me out but to allow for maximum assistance from some local nonprofits that assist with out of town medical expenses (though, I'm not sure I should read the letters at all, because I have no doubt that they will, indeed, just freak me out). It just felt like it became so much bigger in a matter of minutes, if that makes any sense.

[I can see now that since this is a rare form of skin cancer, it's probably better that I'm in a larger city, with a larger hospital, and doctors who have more experience with looking at this specific type of cancer, since the key part of the procedure is making sure that none of the cancer cells remain. I didn't see it then though!]

Because of the nature of where I received the call about having to go up to Portland, it also meant explaining the whole situation over and over again, which was a little hard for me. I know it was simply because my friends and family care about me and wanted to know what was going on. But saying it out loud is still hard. I don't like to breakdown in public, and I don't always trust my emotions with this yet. Then, over the course of the day, a few well-intentioned people voiced concerns and statements like, "How do they know that this cancer isn't everywhere already?" I can understand the heart behind those statements, but at the time, they just freaked me out even more.

And I feel kind of crappy even mentioning this, but I was also overwhelmed with offers to help--cooking meals, watching Lizzy, everything. Normally, this would definitely be a good thing, but I was already so overloaded with information that it just didn't feel like the good kind of overwhelmed at the time. I felt like I couldn't make any decision at all, and the idea of possibly hurting anyone's feelings by saying 'Thanks, but we've already got that covered,' just sent me over the top. Like I said, I feel a little terrible for even writing this, because obviously having more help than needed is a great problem to have, and I'm so thankful for my family and friends. I'm at the point now where I *truly* appreciate all the offers to help...and to all my friends and family--I'm sorry if I didn't seem to be appreciative at the time. I was just overwhelmed with information at that point, and didn't know how to handle it all.

And then on the way home, I felt like every song on the radio was of the I-can't-wait-to-be-in-heaven variety, and I found myself shouting "No! I DO NOT want to be in heaven right now!!' at inanimate objects in the car. I'm sure Lizzy must have thought I'd lost my marbles.

In a way, I guess I had.

I called Justin and told him that I was bringing him Taco Bell for lunch. The day called for fake nacho cheese, you know? Justin is a wise man and sweet husband, and said okay even though he had packed himself a lunch, and it wasn't exactly in the budget. Once I got there, I cried so hard I fogged up all the windows. Asking silly questions that felt so big in my mind at the time, like 'I thought we'd have Lizzy's birthday party that weekend--when will we have it now and what if I don't feel up to throwing a party?'

Justin was great. He listened. And then he laid out a plan for what we'll do--which was exactly what I needed at a time. I needed someone to delegate for me. He told me about the quiet car ride we'll have with adult music. That it can be a fun(ish) weekend away instead of just a trip for the procedure. Maybe I'll even be able to convince him to eat at Cafe Yumm ;)

Then, I went home and had an afternoon in my pajamas browsing Pinterest (thank you Dad for the router that makes Pinterest browsing possible!).

I say all this because I think it's important to be clear that however the last few posts may have come across, I'm not without worry or fear about all this. The worry and fear come sneaking up, especially at night. However, the worries don't feel as all-consuming as they have. I'm trying not to dwell on them as I have in the past--I'm trying to nip them in the bud. Pray about them. Surrender them. And then move past them. But let me be clear--I don't do it right all the time. Not even close.

I'm doing okay again now. Feeling more positive, but a little frustrated to not know more--the nurse from Portland acknowledged that this is often the case with patients who have the more rare forms of skin cancer because their local dermatologist often doesn't know a ton about it other than that the patient needs to be referred to Portland. And since we're out of town, we don't sit down and talk with the doctor ahead of time--that all happens on the day of the surgery (though she did assure me that I can always call if I have more questions). For now though, sometimes it's a little hard to balance what my dermatologist has told me (essentially that this is NOT a big deal) with some of the stories and info that I initially read online. Does my doctor really know what she's talking about? But then again, how do I even know that the stories I initially read online are accurate and/or reflective of my situation?

It's a little hard, sometimes. Everyone tells me that they are sure that I'll be fine...but they were all also sure that it wasn't cancer in the first place, so...

No. I need to stop thinking that way. It's a logical fallacy, and I know it. Don't ask me which one, because it's been far too long since I've taken AP Comp.

I think I've also decided that I'm going to try to limit writing about this on the blog to no more than once a week, if at all possible. I'm kind of tired of writing about it, just as I'm sure you're all tired of reading about it. I know that sometimes I'll need to get things out and just vent, but I also don't want my blog to become a place where I can drown myself in worries and obsessive thoughts. I need a balance. And, I need to force myself to do and write about other things too.

Tomorrow? I'm writing about Outlander :)

Letter to Lizzy- Twenty-Two and Twenty-Three Months

2011-12-14T12:00:00.000-08:00

Dear Lizzy Girl,

I can hardly believe that you're almost two. I know that I say that I can hardly believe how old you are every month, but this time feels especially crazy.

You are wearing a combo of 24 month and 2T clothes. I still don't think you've quite hit 30 lbs yet. You're still rear-facing in your car seat, except on certain occasions when we have to go somewhere in your dad's truck--and when you *do* get to forward face, you love it. You always request that we "rock out" with you. On a couple of occasions, you've thrown major tantrums, because you want to see a pink (or blue, or white) car next to us. We've tried to explain that we don't have any control over the other cars on the road, but I don't think you're quite getting that yet!

You continue to say hilarious things almost every day. For example, the other night you were doing an Advent craft with Papa Gary that involved coloring on a board. He had been telling you and all the other kids all about the board, what was going to be written on it, what it meant, etc. Anyway, when you decided that you were done coloring, you ran around the corner with the board over your head and yelled, "Mama! I'm board!" which, of course sounded like "I'm bored!" and got a huge reaction, so now you say 'I'm board/bored' often.

You've also continued to talk about babies a TON, and want one in mama's belly very badly. the other night you said, "Pray baby in mama's belly. Blue hat." I tried to explain to you that mom is a little sick right now and needs to be better before I can have a baby in my belly, but you just looked at me very sternly and said, "I pray baby."

Lately, you haven't been playing with a lot of your toys, but you have been really into coloring. When I'm coloring with you, you'll often take a crayon of your own, scribble right on top of what I'm coloring, and say, "Here. There you go!"

You're not completely potty trained yet, but you're getting there. You're asking more and more often to sit on the toilet, and are having pretty good success with actually going as well. I could probably do a better job of letting you wear real underwear around the house, but things have just been kind of crazy lately! Maybe we'll tackle it a bit more in the next couple of weeks. I'm not worried about it!

I love you sweet girl, and I always will!

Love Came Down: (In)spired Deals Review & Giveaway!

2011-12-13T06:00:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was shaping up to be a really bad day.

Let's just be real here--getting a call that I have skin cancer (I still can't really believe that I'm even typing that) was not the highlight of my year, even in light of the fact that I have experienced a remarkable amount of peace about the whole situation or the fact that the prognosis is incredible. It's still just not a great experience.

Within an hour of receiving the call from the dermatologist, the FedEx man knocked on my door...with a huge box from DaySpring and (in)courage. Words cannot even begin to describe what a blessing it was to me that this box arrived at the precise moment it did. For the blessing of a gentle reminder that love came down, for me.

Inside, was the absolutely stunning Star Tea Light Holder:

I could probably write paragraphs upon paragraphs about the understated, simple beauty of this tea light holder, but I think the pictures can probably do it more justice than I could.

First side:

Second Side:

Really, could the stain be any more perfect? It's the perfect distressed, reclaimed wood look.
And if that weren't enough, they tossed in some coffee mugs, also from the Love Came Down line.

Really, there are just no words to adequately describe this gift that I have been given--these visual reminders that God is with me, always. Even now, even through this. It is a tremendous blessing to me to be able to have these ever-present reminders to see daily, early each morning as I shuffle to the kitchen to start my day with coffee.

Even better? DaySpring and (in)courage are allowing me to bless one of you with a $20 shop credit. And guys, there are some amazing things on clearance over at the DaySpring shop. Like these:

Bless This Home Wall Art-$15

Everyday Joy Gift Set-$19.99

Jesus is the Gift Platter- $6.25

To enter, simply leave a comment on this post. The giveaway will be open until Tuesday December 20th at 7am PST. For the love of all things good, please make sure that there's an email address attached to the account you use to enter, or that you leave some way for me to contact you in the event that you win! Good luck!

Fine Print and Disclosure Statement: The winner will have seven days to respond to my email. If I haven't heard back within seven calendar days, I'll pick a new winner. Winner will be responsible for paying their own postage. In addition, the coupon code will not activate unless the total in the cart meets or exceeds $20. I received both the Star Tea Light Holder and the mugs at no cost to me, for the purpose of review. I was not compensated for the review itself, and all opinions are my own, as always.

So.

2011-12-12T14:26:00.000-08:00

First of all, thank you all for your thoughts and prayers through this whole "mystery bruise" ordeal. I so appreciate all your words of encouragement.

So. The dermatologist called this afternoon and told me that the "mystery bruise" is actually the weird form of skin cancer (DFSP I think). Again, she told me that I don't need to worry--that this type of skin cancer does not spread anywhere else, but that it can grow pretty aggressively where it's at, so they will need to do something called a Moh's Procedure to make sure that she got every last bit. Basically, with this procedure, they remove a layer of skin at a time, test it, and then continue until there's no trace of the DFSP.

She also told me that most times, DFSP's aren't found until they are like grapefruit sized. Mine was like dime sized, so it was very small, which is great.

So now, the issue is that there are apparently only two people in Oregon who do the Moh's Procedure--one locally and one up on Portland. My derm is now trying to convince the local guy to clear a space for me in the next six weeks or so...otherwise we will have to drive up to Portland and stay for a few days, which would be doable, but just another extra expense that we don't need right now!

I'm actually not freaking out that much--not at all really. I'm just hoping they can get me in soon for the Moh's Procedure. I'm sure the worry will probably come, but right now I feel pretty at peace, and for that I'm thankful.

But in terms of good news, the local radio station called and I'm one of 100 qualIfiers for their huge $3,500 winter contest. I'm supposed to go in Thursday to find out if I won! I don't have high hopes since I just don't win things, but wouldn't it be awesome if I did?!

ALSO, I just got the most amazing package from Dayspring that I cannot *wait* to show you guys!

Surrender.

2011-12-12T06:00:00.000-08:00

Well, it's Sunday night (though by the time you read this, it will be Monday morning), and I'm sitting here in the dark and editing some photos on and off while Justin watches Avatar.

I still have no internet other than my Blackberry, which I generally regard as a huge inconvenience, but tonight I'm beginning to think that there may be a silver lining.

You see, I'm fully aware that on Monday or Tuesday I should be hearing back to find out whether the "mystery bruise" is in fact some type of scar tissue, or some rare type of skin cancer. And tonight, the fact that I am completely unable to spend hours online researching treatment plans and survival rates is a blessing. Because truthfully, I probably would be.

These past two weeks, except for a few small freak outs, I have been relatively worry-free about the mystery bruise. I am fully aware that being free of worry these past two weeks is a God thing--it certainly isn't a Meredith thing. I worry. About everything. It's what I do--even being in fourth or fifth grade, I can remember intentionally wearing my heaviest boots to the movie theater, just in case someone tried to hold everyone in the theater hostage--I could use my big heavy boots to kick them in the face and save the day. I worry. Excessively. About things that I can't control. It's always been there, really. So, I had been bracing myself for these past few weeks of waiting, but I have been relatively FREE of that worry, and I am so grateful for the peace that God has provided in my life right now.

But. BUT. Tonight, I'm freaking out a little bit. The phone call could come tomorrow. What if it's skin cancer?

I know that there's no sense in worrying tonight about what tomorrow will bring, especially since my own worrying won't do anything to change the outcome. The funny thing is that I've prayed...I've tried to surrender it to God. I've written down the small blessings in my life, and truly, I'm blessed beyond measure. I ran a mile and lifted, letting the endorphins wash over me and relieve some of my stress.

But. BUT. Still, the anxiety and the fear continue to roll over me like a giant wave. I'm having trouble shaking it. And really, it's not even so much the fear of skin cancer right now...it's the WAITING. I just want to know. And be able to move on, knowing which steps are next.

But really, it's about me learning to surrender. That worrying for enough hours tonight won't make it go away. That I have no control right now, but that God does. That God will not give me skin cancer as a punishment or a "test", nor would he "cure me" just because I've prayed hard enough or done enough good things. But. BUT that even if I do have skin cancer, God will walk me through it, providing me with comfort and strength. That even though sickness is not God's desire or doing, he could use even THAT for good...I just have to stop trying to control it and fix it on my own, and surrender.

"I surrender all
to the promises you made.
And I will give it all
to the maker of the day."
~Newsboys, I Surrender All

Lizzy The Prophet

2011-12-08T06:00:00.000-08:00

So, my sister-in-law Renee is pregnant with her third kiddo (yay! So excited to be an auntie again!). About the same time we found out that Renee was pregnant, Lizzy started talking about babies a LOT more. And some of it? Hysterical.

The other morning, I asked Lizzy if she had any dreams. Quite matter of factly, she responded, "Mama have baby. Blue hat. COMING SOON!!!"

Then tonight as we were laying her down for bed, she said, "Auntie Ney have baby in belly pink hat. Mama have baby coming soon, blue hat." I responded that we'll have to see about that, and Lizzy responded very seriously, "No mama, I see." LOL.

And since I know this will be asked, yes I'm starting to have a bit of baby fever. No, we're not currently trying because (a) I want to wait until the mystery bruise thing is dealt with and (b) our insurance through Justin's work has a $5,000 deductible PER PERSON. No, there's not an extra zero there. So, we need to do some research there about if we have the option to buy any sort of supplemental insurance.

But seriosuly, how funny would it be if Lizzy was right about this?!

One Good Thing

2011-12-07T07:12:00.000-08:00

I am desperately trying to change my outlook this morning. See, yesterday when I woke up, I caught up on some blogs, but anytime I'd try to leave a comment, I'd get a "problem loading page" error.

So, I abandoned that mission, and installed a Windows Update since that was on my to-do list too. And upon restart, both my ethernet port and my wireless card aparently no longer function. No amount of update uninstalling, driver reinstalling, system restoring, or other tricks have worked thus far, and I'm consequently writing this post on my Blackberry because we have no other computer.

Yesterday, I was GRUMPY. I kept whining about between the $1200 car repair, the possible skin cancer, and the broken laptop (the car repair used up our new-laptop fund), it just being TOO MUCH in one month.

And it still sucks, but I'm trying to remember that it will be okay and things will work out, and that I'm still blessed beyond measure.

So help a girl out, and tell me one good thing in your life right now. Would you, please? I need some rejoicing in blessings this morning!

PS- I'm trying to keep up with y'all here on my phone, but commenting is a real PITA, so I'm sorry for the radio silence on my end!

BQOTD: Your Christmas List

2011-12-06T08:40:00.001-08:00

Today's Burning Question of the Day:

What's one thing on your Christmas wish list this year?

The Case for Christ Ch 1-2

2011-12-02T08:33:00.000-08:00

Between stressing about the mystery bruise, Thanksgiving, and spending time with our friends, I just plum forgot that I was supposed to post about The Case for Christ last Friday. So, this Friday and next Friday will be a bit of catch-up as far as that goes.

First, I want to start with a bit of a lengthy quote from the introduction of the book. I found this passage to be particularly interesting because I know I've gone through seasons of my faith where I questioned if I was all wrong. I've heard arguments that made me stop and wonder if my belief was misplaced. I heard professors and friends tell me that I was most certainly wrong in my faith, and that educated people don't believe in God. Sometimes, for me it's been a battle between wanting to be smart and educated (which I felt, for a long time, excluded God) and the stirring in my soul that I just couldn't dismiss. So, I find it really interesting when I hear stories of people who were once hardcore skeptics, and later changed their own system of beliefs. I want to know all about their own journey, and Lee Strobel gave us a glimpse of his story of faith in the Introduction:

"For much of my life, I was a skeptic. In fact, I considered myself an atheist. To me, there was far too much evidence that God was merely a product of wishful thinking, of ancient mythology, of primitive superstition. How could there be a loving God if he consigned people to hell just for not believing in him? How could miracles contravene basic laws of nature? Didn't evolution satisfactorily explain how life originated? Doesn't scientific reasoning dispel belief in the supernatural?

As for Jesus, didn't you know that he never claimed to be God? He was a revolutionary, a sage, an iconoclastic Jew--but God? No, that thought never occurred to him! I could point you to plenty university professors who said so--and certainly they could be trusted, couldn't they? Let's face it: even a cursory explanation of the evidence demonstrates convincingly that Jesus had only been a human being just like you and me, although with unusual gifts of kindness and wisdom.

But that's all I had ever really given the evidence: a cursory look. I had read just enough philosophy and history to find support for my skepticism--a fact here, a scientific theory there, a pithy quote, a clever argument."

Throughout The Case for Christ, it was Strobel's goal to dig a little bit deeper in terms of the evidence that exists for or against the existence of Christ--consult with experts in many different fields to take a second look about what we think we know.

Throughout Chapters 1 and 2, Strobel interviews Craig Bloomberg, a New Testament scholar who focuses on the biographies of Jesus. Stobel tossed Bloomberg a number of familiar questions such as:

"Don't the theological motives cast doubt on [Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John's] ability and willingness to accurately report what happened?"

"Were these first-century writers even interested in recording what actually happened?"

"Even if the writers intended to reliably record history, were they able to do so? How can we be sure that the material about Jesus' life and teachings was well-preserved for thirty years before it was finally written down in the gospels?

and "Won't you concede that faulty memories, wishful thinking, and the development of legend would have irreparably contaminated the Jesus tradition prior to the writing of the gospels?"

I'm willing to bet that most of us have fielded questions like this before, or at least heard them raised. I'm not going to re-hash all of Bloomberg's responses here, but I personally found them fascinating, and encouraging.

Chapters 3 and 4 coming next week!

Thinking About Christmas....Again.

2011-11-30T08:25:00.000-08:00

Note: This past Sunday, during my father-in-law's sermon, he suggested that instead of grumbling when a cashier says "Happy Holidays", we could sincerely say thank you and ask which holiday they celebrate this season...not as part of our own agenda to tell them why they should celebrate Christmas, but just as a way to bless them and let them share about what's meaningful to them. I loved his suggestion, and it reminded me that I wanted to re-run this post. It was originally posted December 9, 2009. I'm re-posting it today because (a) I'm proud of what I wrote then, and (b) I could use a reminder about being conscious of my words and actions this holiday season.

Lately, on TV, the internet, and occasionally even in person, I'm hearing a lot of frustration from fellow believers about Christmas. Almost every day, I receive a Facebook request for a group called something to the effect of "Put CHRIST back in Christmas!" I hear Bill O'Reilly ranting and raving about the "secularization of Christmas." And as a Christian, I completely understand wanting our family to focus on the birth of Christ during this time. However, sometimes I also think about the message that Christians as a whole are giving to those who celebrate Christmas as a secular, rather than a religious holiday. Sometimes I worry that we come across as being rather hostile--'Give us OUR holiday back!' or 'People who celebrate Christmas and don't believe in Jesus are idiots!'

Much like Dan Merchant discussed in his book "Lord, Save Us From Your Followers", I would venture to guess that not too many non-believers feel loved on by Christians during the holiday season. I would venture to guess that some of them probably feel a pretty hostile response when they say that they don't go to church on Christmas Day, or that they believe Christmas is nothing more than a government sponsored economy boost. As a Christian, I strive to act and respond to others in such a way that they never experience hatred or hostility from me...only compassion and love. Because really, Jesus's message was one of love. I'm not perfect, and I don't always succeed at this, but I do try to be mindful of it.

Here's something that I didn't know until my first term in college--that both Christmas and Advent are symbolic celebrations. The Bible does not give us the actual date that Jesus was born, and it's pretty well accepted within both the religious and academic communities that in all likelihood, Jesus' birth was not on Dec 25th (read more about this here). Rather, early believers chose to remember his birth on that day for a few reasons. First, Dec 25th coincides with several pagan and secular celebrations, which allowed early believers to remember Jesus' birth without having to worry about being persecuted for their beliefs. Second, as more people came to believe and the persecution of Christians died down, the early church felt that it would be easier to substitute an "immoral secular" holiday with a "moral" one, rather than to eliminate a holiday altogether and schedule a new one (Augustine makes reference to this idea in his sermons).

So, "Christmas" was the religious significance that the church gave to a holiday that was originally secular, though known by another name at the time. Now, both the secular and religious celebrations have come to be known as "Christmas". And yes, the name "Christmas" does come from the name that those celebrating the birth of Jesus gave the day. However, many of the traditions that we continue to associate as part of the religious aspects of Christmas, like Christmas trees, are carried over from the secular holiday that pre-dated the religious holiday. Call it what you'd like, December 25th has long-since been a date that shared both secular and religious significance. And that's okay.

While I choose to celebrate Christmas for it's religious significance to me, I think it's important for us as Christians to remember that there has long-since been a secular significance to Christmas. And the secular celebration of Christmas doesn't in any way jeopardize the religious significance that we as Christians attribute to December 25th. Neither does the separation of church and state, which prevents state institutions from publically recognizing the religious aspect of Christmas.

Rather, the topic of religious vs. secular Christmas celebrations provides a great opportunity for us to have a dialogue with others about our beliefs regarding Christmas (while also allowing others to share their own beliefs regarding the day). Advent and Christmas are a particularly approrpiate time for this because as we remember Christ's initial coming into the flesh, it is a great opportunity for us also to remember and share that we do not need to be perfect people to come to Jesus--he has already come for us and will continue to come to us in the midst of absolutely any circumstance. There is no sin too great. No matter how broken we are or how much we've sinned when we turn to Jesus, he accepts us with open arms and tells us that he has already come to pay for our sins and that we've already been forgiven. What a comfort and blessing!

So, in my humble opinion, I think it's important for us to remember the historical significance of Christmas, and that it is and was both a religious and secular holiday. And rather than be angry and upset about that, let's use the opportunity to have a dialogue about our beliefs about Christmas and what it symbolizes. But in order to convey Jesus's Gospel of Love, we MUST do so lovingly and with respect.

So. An update about the bruise.

2011-11-29T10:01:00.000-08:00

So, I just got a call from the dermatologist. She said that they are sending my "bruise" to Portland for a second opinion because it could be benign scar tissue, but it could also be that "zebra" she was telling me about, which something called a "DFSP" and is a very rare sarcoma. They should have the results in about two weeks. She then said (and I wrote this down pretty much exactly because I will need to remind myself of this over the next two weeks), "I don't want you to stress out because this isn't a big issue. This kind of sarcoma doesn't have lasting health effects or anything like that. It's not a big deal. If it comes back as positive, it would just require another in-office surgery to make sure we got it all, and we may want to do that anyway."

When we got off the phone, I was a little confused and obviously scared that she was talking about a "sarcoma". So, I googled "DFSP", and was not at all prepared for all the scary info that came my way. I don't know--even though I know sarcomas are cancer, from the way that the dermatologist portrayed it as really being no big deal, I just wasn't prepared for all the cancer info that popped up...and while a lot of it did say that the survival rate is much higher than other cancers (the 5 year survival rate is 99.2% and the 15 year survival rate is 97.2%), the bottom line is that I was just not prepared to even be seeing words like "survival rate".

And I couldn't stop myself from thinking 'Well, if it IS this extremely rare form of skin cancer that only like 5 in a million get anyway, what's to say that I wouldn't be the exception to the rule when it comes to the survival rate as well?'

Ugh. This is scary.

But on the other hand, nothing is for sure yet, and it could just be scar tissue and be totally fine.

I'm not sure how I'm going to get through the next two weeks without totally freaking out.

I'll tell you one thing though--tomorrow, when Justin gets paid,I'm going to order What Women Fear by Angie Smith. I'm going to carve out time every day to try and study and pray. I'm going to try to actually accept the comfort and strength that God readily offers to me. And right now, I'm going to curl up on the couch, and watch a movie with my sweet girl.

Things Learned from Pinterest...

2011-11-29T08:18:00.000-08:00

So, I was browsing my "House Inspiration" board on Pinterest this morning. I've been pinning things to it, but haven't actually opened it up for awhile. As soon as I did, I laughed out loud, because this is what I saw:

Source: houseofturquoise.com via Meredith on Pinterest

Source: wanelo.com via Meredith on Pinterest

Source: remodelaholic.com via Meredith on Pinterest

Source: community.thebump.com via Meredith on Pinterest

Source: houseofturquoise.com via Meredith on Pinterest

Source: homelife.com.au via Meredith on Pinterest

Source: nikinikinine.blogspot.com via Meredith on Pinterest

Are you picking up on a theme here?! And yet, my house? The walls are definitely more gray than blue...which was all the rage on The Nest when we bought our house. I didn't really know what I liked at the time in terms of style, so I just went with that, and it does look nice, but I think this color blue is a lot more "us"--or maybe I should say it's more "me", because I don't think J has particularly strong feelings about paint, other than he doesn't particularly want to spend money on it ;)

Maybe someday!

This and That

2011-11-28T07:43:00.001-08:00

-I actually did something I pinned on Pinterest! I saw this quite awhile ago, suggesting to wrap up 25 Christmas books, and let your kiddo open one each night.

Source: katherinemariephotography.com via Meredith on Pinterest

Originally, I planned to do it with non-Christmas books that we already have but don't read often. Then, between being given a bunch of Christmas books, finding a bunch at Goodwill, and raiding my parents' stash from when we were kids, we had 30 Christmasy books. So, I wrapped them up, and we've actually been letting Lizzy choose a book to open since Saturday.

I think Justin was a little suspect about letting her open a "present" a day, but I think it's a fun little Christmas tradition that we'll be able to do for years for only the cost of wrapping paper.

-I had what was probably my last photo shoot of the season over the weekend--for two girls that I went to high school with! They said that their parents don't really have any nice photos other than their senior pictures, so they wanted to surprise them with new photos of the kids for Christmas. LOVE that idea! And I've got to say, as much as I love shooting families/kids, there is something to be said for shooting adults who actually listen to instructions and smile when you tell them to! ;)

-I'm usually kind of a scrooge about decorating for Christmas until December, but after looking at our December calendar, I totally pressured J to put up our tree this weekend. And honestly, it's kind of fun. Now, I just have to figure out what to do with the rest of my decorations--I feel like half the stuff I have is the bright pink/green/turquoise Christmas stuff, and half is "natural"...and that just looks hodge-podged. I haven't quite figured out which direction I want to go with it, and also how to do it low-cost.

-We did Black Friday shopping, and this is the first year I can honestly say it was not worth it. Our Wal-Mart told me that none of the electronics were going on sale until 3am, and that it was basically only kids stuff that was on sale when they opened at 10pm. So we went at 11pm, and figured we'd miss the rush. Noooooo. We were out from 11pm-3:30am, and only made it to Wal-Mart and Old Navy. Wal-Mart was so crowded that the line literally wrapped all around the aisles, so you couldn't really look at anything anyway. It was absurd, and I didn't even get any good deals because you couldn't actually get to much of anything! I went back later Friday at like 8pm, and got everything that was on my list anyway. Lesson learned. And thank goodness, our crazy birthday/Christmas shopping is pretty much done. We still need to do Lizzy and each other, but that's all dependent on what J's check looks like and the actual end-cost of fixing The Most Expensive Car To Fix Ever.

-Speaking of which, our car goes in on Wednesday. Hopefully, it will be done soon thereafter. I'm still kind of pissed that it's going to cost $1,100 to fix. I'm also seriously hoping it doesn't cost MORE in the end. Still, trying to remain grateful that (a) it didn't break down on the side of the road and end up costing more and, (b) that we can actually pay for it, even though it will wipe out most of our emergency fund. Then again, I suppose this is exactly what emergency funds are for. But still. SUCK.

BQOTD- One thing you love about your spouse.

2011-11-22T07:21:00.000-08:00

Because it's easier to default to complaining.

Because sometimes the good things get pushed to the back of my mind instead of the front.

Because we're all imperfect.

Because I sometimes need to cultivate a heart of blessing and thankfulness.

Today's BQOTD- What's one thing you love about
your spouse/significant other?

I'll go first--Justin is one of the most caring people I know, and is always ready to jump in and help others in any way he can.

Fabric Scrap Tu-Tu Tutorial

2011-11-21T08:09:00.000-08:00

Last night, I was supposed to be making fabric flowers for our church's annual Christmas bazaar. But then, I saw Lizzy wearing one of the stretchy headbands around her waist, and I had an idea--why not tie the strips of fabric onto a headband and make her a tu-tu? So I did. I didn't follow any particular tutorial, though they are ALL OVER Pinterest. I just did what made sense to me, and I think it worked.

I tried to get a totally cute picture of Lizzy wearing her tu-tu, but she was so excited to see it when she woke up that all I got was a lot of this:

So, these are REALLY simple, if not time-consuming to make. Here's how you do it and what you need:

1. Either elastic, or one of those stretchy headbands that we all use for running/working-out. Lizzy wears both 24months and 2T clothing, and the headband is a little big on her as a tu-tu.
2. 55-60 strips of fabric--about 1 inch wide, and 20-22 inches long. I didn't worry about the edges, but you could cut them with fancy (bunting?) scissors to give the edges a pattern.

First, take a strip of fabric, and fold it in half. Next, you'll knot the strip of fabric around the headband by taking the looped end of the strip under the headband, and then pulling the free ends of fabric over the headband and through the loop.

Continue knotting fabric all the way around the waistband, but try not to pull your knots too tight or the elastic may twist. And TA-DA, you're done. I kept to a pink/purple/turquoise scheme for the most part because that's mostly what I had...but I think these would be really cute even using non-matching fabric.

I keep debating about whether or not to make a few of these to sell at the bazaar as well, but they're just kind of time intensive, and I'm not sure that I could sell them for the $15-$20 that I'd want to in order to feel like my time was worth it. Maybe I'll just make one and see if it sells...

Happy Monday everyone!

Things in my Head

2011-11-19T08:52:00.000-08:00

-I went to the dermatologist yesterday for the mystery bruise. She didn't really know what it was either, but her top three guesses are all harmless. The fourth possibility she called a "zebra"--extremely rare, but concerning. Because of my medical history where rare = my life, she decided to have it biopsied, and cut it out. So, now I'm chilling here with stitches in my back, and a prohibition from picking up Lizzy for the next three days (which is really easy to follow when you've got a screaming, tantruming child who will not listen and a husband in the shower) but no more information than I had before.

And of course, the night before I went, I was congested, had a migraine all day, and just felt miserable. I woke up through the night alternately sweating and freezing--almost like I had a fever. The first thing she asked in regards to the 'zebra' was, "You haven't had any fevers or night chills have you?" Of course. I told her that I had, just the night before, but she said that she wasn't all that worried in the context of the other cold-like symptoms. But seriously, I haven't had a fever or night sweats in probably a year. WHY did it have to make it's appearance right before going to the doctor, and give me something else to let my mind get wrapped up in worry about?! Overall, I've done pretty well with not worrying, but worry is a sneaky thing, and can take over so quickly--it doesn't need any extra footholds in my mind.

-Just after the dermatologist, we found out that it's going to cost $1,100 to fix our car. Our car has been rumbling, so we took it to our mechanic. It turns out that both the clutch and some bearings need to be replaced, and the Kia Sorento that we own seems to be the most expensive car in the world in terms of parts. I was figuring about $500, but the $1,100 was kind of a punch in the gut. Thankfully, we are in a better position financially than we have been in years and I'm confident that we'll actually be able to do it. The bad news is that it will essentially totally un-do all the work we've been doing in terms of savings and such, and Justin and I will probably only just do stockings again for Christmas, and that just sucks, you know? And could it happen at a worse time with Christmases and birthdays aplenty approaching?!

It's funny though, because usually I am the freak-outter and Justin is the one telling me everything will be okay, and that God is faithful to provide for our needs. This time, those roles were totally reversed--I was all calm and tranquil, and Justin was freaking out...though, I think he was mad more than anything else, because I know he had been wanting to get a new laptop for me for Christmas. But obviously, that's off the table now, which doesn't upset me, but I know is frustrating and irritating for him.

-But, to redeem the day, when we got home from the ridiculous morning, I had not one, but TWO pairs of free jeans waiting for me! One pair was a consolation prize of sorts from Lee Jeans for not winning the Life in Lee photo contest, and they are great. They're a pair of mid-rise skinny jeans in a long length--is it me, or are those REALLY hard to find?! And, they're stretch, but not skin tight or completely stretch. Still, they are the most comfortable jeans I think I've ever worn, and I'm excited to finally have a pair that I can tuck into boots. The second pair was from Meg, who totally blessed me by sending me a pair of the old school Long and Lean jeans after I raved about them the other day! I'm so excited!

-And THEN, I got to meet Cara @ Whimsy Smitten. Some of you may have seen the craziness that transpired during the post about the Band going to Mt. Shasta, but if you missed it, here's a re-cap: I came across Cara's blog several months ago (maybe from Incourage?), and at the time, she and her husband were living in Texas. Not too long ago, she mentioned that they were moving back to Oregon. I asked her where she was from, and she responded with the name of the small-town where Justin's parents live, and that they were living with their in-laws until they found a place. We talked about how it was such a small world, and that we should get together sometime, but it hadn't happened. AND THEN, when I posted about the band going to Mt. Shasta, Cara responded that the in-laws that she and her husband are living with are actually the drummer of the band and his wife! None of us had any idea--what a small world! So anyway, Cara's husband made some delicious pizza for all of us last night, and we got to meet and hang while the band had "practice" last night. It was tons of fun, and also totally helped redeem a sucky morning!

BQOTD: Black Friday/Stores Open Early

2011-11-18T07:54:00.000-08:00

BQOTD: Do you go shopping on Black Friday? What do you usually shop for (i.e. doorbusters, Christmas presents for others, presents for yourself)?

Also, What do you think of this year's trend for stores to open earlier than ever on Thanksgiving night for "Black Friday" sales? Toys R Us opens at 9pm; Target, Best Buy, Kohls, Wal-Mart, and Old Navy are all open at midnight?

___________________________________________________

Personally, I have a love/hate relationship with Black Friday. I hate the crowds. I hate the bustle. But on the other hand, when we do our Christmas shopping for others on Black Friday, we *do* end up saving significantly.

On one hand, I like the idea of stores being open on Thanksgiving evening since I have an easier time staying up late than getting up early, but I also hate the fact that it means that retail employees may not to get to spend Thanksgiving with their families or would have to sleep through the day in order to report to work at midnight. There are so few days that retail stores are just flat-out closed, and I kind of like when they are.

The Stranger at Target...

2011-11-16T15:59:00.000-08:00

On Wednesdays, I watch Logan (Lizzy's cousin) in the morning before he goes to afternoon pre-K. This morning, our area rug was still wet after being steam cleaned, so I decided that rather than try to keep two kiddos off the drying rug, we'd head into town and run some errands. We had already been a few places when we headed to Target.

It was raining when we arrived, so it took a minute to find a cart that wasn't completely drenched. Once I did, I tried to put Lizzy in the seat, and she proceeded to throw a huge tantrum--she wanted to sit in the actual cart instead of the seat, which sometimes I let her do, but I thought that I might be getting some larger things today, and so I wanted her in the seat with the buckle. I told her that I understood that she was saying she wanted to sit in the cart, but that this time she needed to sit in the seat. She continued to throw a huge fit--swinging her arms, stamping her legs. I took her out of the cart, set her on the ground, kneeled down, and told her that screaming like this was not okay, and that if she couldn't calm down immediately, we would go outside for a time-out. She threw herself on the floor.

So, I picked her up, and pushed the cart with Logan (obviously, I hope!) outside to one of the benches under the awning, sat Lizzy down, and told her that she was in a time-out, and that once she stopped screaming, we could talk. She responded, "No TALK. LIZZY SCREAM!" and then continued to scream at the top of her lungs. I debated just packing up the kids and heading home, and maybe I'll get some grief for not doing so, but I did have errands that I needed to run, and I had already driven into town--it's not like I could just pop back to Target once Justin got home. So, since we were outside, I decided to just ignore the screaming...which seems to be most effective in calming Lizzy down in situations where she's screaming in an attempt to get something that she wants rather than because she's frustrated. I had the cart in front of the bench, perpendicular, so that I could see her and catch her if she decided to throw herself off the bench or something, but wasn't really engaging with her behavior.

Several people gave me looks as they walked by. You probably know the ones. Maybe you've been on the receiving end. Or the giving end.

Can't you make her stop crying?
My child would NEVER get away with that crap.
Aren't you going to do something about her screaming?

I wanted to yell at them, "Even her pediatrician says the most effective way to handle her stubborn, sometimes hours long tantrums right now is to ignore them. I AM doing something, and at least I took her outside to handle it, okay?!"

It's hard not to get a little flustered when your child is throwing a royal fit, and there's not a lot you can do to stop it. It's hard not to wonder if what you're doing is the right thing...even if your parents and friends tell you that it is. I sometimes wonder if people (strangers) realize that, say, picking up my phone during a tantrum isn't me not handling the situation--it's a way of showing her that I will not engage with her while she's behaving that way, and I will focus my attention elsewhere (just for the record, ignoring seems to be the recommended tactic for handling tantrums from all across the parenting spectrum, from Dr. Sears to Dobson/Focus on the Family). Deep down, I know that I handled it the best way that I could have--but it's hard not to question yourself when you get those darn looks from strangers.

And then, it what I can only describe as a moment of pure grace, an older woman walked by, pushing her cart. She touched my arm, leaned in close, and said, "You handled that just right." I was kind of stunned, but I think I managed to mumble "Thank you," and she smiled and walked away.

I almost cried right there in the Target parking lot. Thank you, whoever you were. Truly. Thank you for recognizing a mama who was frazzled, and thank you for taking that recognition a step further by offering encouragement and affirmation. Thank you for recognizing that sometimes, encouragement from a stranger can be a particularly soothing kind of balm. I'll never forget it.

And I'll try to pass it on.

Random Snippets

2011-11-16T08:47:00.000-08:00

-Awhile ago, a few of you asked what I thought about Paulo Coelho's The Alchemist. I've been meaning to write a full review, but I just don't feel like I have a lot to say. I didn't hate it. I didn't love it. The writing style was easy enough for me to read, but I sort of felt like there was some esoteric message about...I'm not even sure what...that I just wasn't privy to. I kept thinking 'I must be missing something--it can't be this simple, can it?' I mean, I could venture to guess that the book was a metaphor for this or that, but I just love the book enough to want to spend any spare time wondering what the author really meant when he said "sand", ya know?

-I shampooed our area rug last night. It was the first time I'd done it in the 3 years we've lived here, and it was DISGUSTING. I shampooed it twice, and then asked Justin to do it once more while I put Lizzy down. He ended up doing it twice because he said that the water was so nasty when he dumped it out his first run (third overall). So, we've gone over it a total of four times, and the water we dump out is STILL nasty. Maybe now Justin understands why I'm always bugging him to keep his work boots off the rug...because seriously, I don't even want to KNOW what plumber's boots have all over them, let alone do I want them on my rug. Gross.

-I'm still doing TurboFire, and I do like it. It's fun. The only thing that I don't like is that many of the people in the video don't look like real people to me. Many of them look like they've had plastic surgery of some kind, which is fine if that's your thing, but sometimes I just worry that it is distorting my idea of what "fit" looks like.

-I have NO IDEA what to get Lizzy for Christmas or her birthday. Parents of toddlers--what are YOU doing?

Something New

2011-11-15T13:28:00.000-08:00

Both Bible Studies that I've been involved with have just wrapped up until after the holidays. The problem is that without some sort of structured study, especially during the holiday season, it's really easy for me to fall out of taking time for devotionals and just spending time in the Word. So, even though the Fall Bible Study wasn't the most successful thing I've done on this blog, I want to continue with hosting something in that same vein for the winter and holiday season, if for no other reason than to keep ME on track. Only this time, I'd like to do something a little bit different...this time, a sort of "book club":

From the back of the book: Retracing his own spiritual journey, Strobel cross-examines the experts with tough point-blank questions: How reliable is the New Testaments? Does evidence exist for Jesus outside the Bible? Is there any reason to believe the resurrection was an actual historical event?

This remarkable book reads like a captivating, fast paced novel. But it's not fiction. It's a riveting quest for truth about history's most compelling figure. What will your verdict be in The Case for Christ?

One of the reasons that I picked this book is that it's readily available--I come across copies in the used bookstores often, and most libraries seem to have a copy or two. Some of you may already own it, or have already read it (which is great!). On Amazon, I think it's $8. And local friends, I have an extra copy if anyone is interested.

I'm hoping that anyone who is interested can read along, and then on Fridays, we'll discuss--maybe one of the discussion questions at the end of each chapter? If anyone is interested, I'd LOVE IT if some of you would claim a Friday to guest post here about your thoughts. If you are game to "host" via guest post, let me know!

So, here's the schedule that I'm planning to follow (and I know that beginning by the 25th is going to be a bit of a stretch, but I'm hoping that even if you aren't able to get a copy by the 25th, the holiday weekend may give you some time to catch up for the following week):

11/25- Intro, Chapters 1 & 2
12/2- Chapters 3 & 4
12/9- Chapters 5 & 6
12/16- Chapters 7 & 8
12/23- Chapters 9 & 10
12/30- Chapters 11 & 12
1/6- Chapters 13 & 14
1/13- Conclusion

I hope you'll join me :)

A Trip and A Tantrum of Epic Proportions

2011-11-14T06:00:00.000-08:00

Over the weekend, we trekked down to Mt. Shasta, CA for Justin's band to play at this little place called The Coffee Connection. It's actually a non-profit sponsored by 8 different churches in Mt. Shasta--all employees are volunteers from those churches. On Saturday nights, they have free coffee, free wi-fi, and often have bands that come down and play. It's a pretty cool outreach ministry.

{The Coffee Connection has this catwalk on the second story
where you can see the band that's playing below. It's pretty cool!}

{The only bad thing about shooting the band indoors without a flash is that I have to shoot with my ISO at 1600, which means grain out the wazoo. Oh well--I tell myself that the "gritty" look is appropriate for a band!}

{One funny thing: I am 99% sure that I know which song Renee is
singing just by looking at this photo! Renee, if you're reading, it's He Cries, right?}

{Hey look--it's my (biological) sister who looks absolutely nothing like me.
In fact, people usually think she's Renee's sister instead of mine!}

Since we thought we'd get done around 10:30-11pm and then still have to drive back home, Lizzy stayed with my parents. The plan was for us to come back to their house and stay the night there since they live closer to CA than we do. Only, when we got back sometime around midnight, she was still awake. My parents had been trying to get her to sleep since 8pm, but Lizzy is one of the most stubborn kids you'll ever meet, and was still wide awake. At the time that we arrive, she was in fairly good spirits, but that quickly deteriorated. I tried turning on a movie to lay down with her, and she got HYSTERICAL. Kicking. Screaming. Trying to scratch and bite. I tried rocking. I tried singing. I tried every discipline tactic that I know--I could not get her to stop screaming hysterically at the top of her lungs. Justin came in the room, and I told him that I thought we might have to go home, at which point Lizzy started screaming, "NO MAMA! MAMA GO AWAY! LIZZY NO MAMA!"

Talk about making your heart break. I cried. At that point, it was almost 1am. We packed everything up, and decided that we just needed to go. She screamed at the top of her lungs for the next 20 minutes in the car before finally falling asleep.This morning, when she woke up, she came into bed with us and said, "Mama. Lizzy naughty. I sorry." Sweet precious girl. But, we had another hysterical sleep battle tonight as well. Please tell me there's a sleep regression or something around 2 years (she already has her 2 year molars I believe), because this is getting out of control.

To end on a good note though, here's a mash-up of the band's set if you're interested!

Betcha Didn't Know....

2011-11-10T08:42:00.000-08:00

I totally stole this from Katie @ Loves of Life. But, today, I needed and wanted something fun and mindless!

Guilty Pleasure?

"Reality" TV. Think Sister Wives, Top Chef, Project Runway, etc. It's just mindless TV that I can usually watch while knitting, cleaning, or folding laundry, and just veg out. Also, this:

Pinnacle Whipped Vodka. It tastes like whipped cream and is AMAZING in apple cider, root beer, orange juice, cranberry juice...pretty much anything!

Recent Splurge?

Does buying blackberries even though they're out of season and expensive count? Seriously though, I don't really buy things for myself very much because it just isn't in the budget. In fact, I was just telling Justin the other day that I think every single one of my sweaters is either a maternity sweater, or I wore while I was pregnant with Lizzy so they're stretched out all funny. In the next month, I do plan on splurging to buy a new dress to wear Christmas Eve/ to Justin's company party.

In bulk, I buy?

I try to avoid Costco because it's impossible to get out of there spending less than $100. But when we do go, we usually buy diapers, wipes, Black Butte Porter for Justin, cheese, pepperoni, and milk.

My go-to flower?

I really like purple dutch irises. I prefer the non-bearded irises that look like this:

Comfort Food?

This one is hard, because the truth is that I just love food. But, I think it's probably a big bowl of rice, beans, shredded beef, tomatoes, sour cream, cheese, and Cafe Yumm sauce.

For breakfast?

Today, I had coffee, a piece of toast with almond butter, and a little bit of homemade raspberry jam.

For dinner?

Last night, I tried that boil-in-milk macaroni recipe that's been floating around Pinterest lately. It wasn't my favorite. Tonight, I'll probably just do enchiladas.

Love/hate relationship with?

I can't think of anything off the top of my head.

Can't stop watching?

Any guesses? Ha!

Bones, of course!

Dreaming about?

Babies. Seriously. I feel like every time I close my eyes, I'm pregnant with triplets. Baby fever might be kicking in a little bit, but we just can't go there yet for a couple different reasons.

Every girl should have?

A pair of jeans that fit perfectly. I miss the old Gap Long and Lean jeans like crazy. They were in my dream last night too--I bought a pair of the old style ones even they cost $100!

My style in five words?

I don't really have a style. I'd be fine living in yoga pants 24/7. I've been trying to follow along with the challenge on Like A Warm Cup of Coffee to get dressed every day. Sweet Sarah Mae said at the beginning of the challenge something like, "Your kids will love it, your husband will love it, and you'll feel better about yourself." I had to laugh to myself, because I'm not sure Justin really ever notices what I'm wearing. In fact, I think he'd be fine if I were in yoga pants and tennis shoes all the time, because it would mean that we could spontaneously play a game of football/softball/whatever at any given time.

I love wearing?

Yoga pants. Duh. But also, I love the several shirts I have that are actually "tall" shirts. I'm not pulling them down to cover my wrists or pulling the hem down.

Dream Job?

Being paid to read books and take photos. So, pretty much, what I'm doing now. And it's awesome.

Evolution of a Nursery

2011-11-09T07:53:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago, my brother was given a king sized bed, so he and my parents were getting rid of his twin mattress. Justin and I quickly nabbed it, and it's been sitting in our garage ever since. We'd been talking about when to transition Lizzy out of her crib, and onto a twin mattress on the floor (for now) but thought that maybe we'd wait until she actually climbed out. Also, we didn't really know where we'd store the crib in the meantime since we're working on cleaning out our garage and spare bedroom.

And then a week or so ago, Kaitlin called to ask if I knew anyone that they could borrow a crib from while they are staying here. And it was a no-brainer--we'd been trying to figure out when to transition Lizzy, and decided that it just made sense for us to move Lizzy and let them use her old crib.

So, over the weekend, we broke down her crib and hauled in the twin sized bed.

(For now, we just got her a set of sheets that she picked out, and she uses a spare comforter.

Eventually, she'll get her own, I'm just waiting for a sale!)

The dresser went into the closet to allow for a little more play room, since it's a pretty small room to begin with.

So far, Lizzy has done remarkably well. It's also nice for me to be able to lay down in bed with her if she's having a rough day or night! I have to admit though--I don't usually get all sad and weepy about Lizzy growing up, but I *was* a little sad when we were taking down her crib! It was the first time I honestly found myself missing the newborn stage just a little bit.

Decorating for Seasons

2011-11-08T13:57:00.000-08:00

In the time that Justin and I have been married, I've never really decorated for seasons. Except Christmas, but even then, it's pretty much just been a Christmas tree and a miniature nativity set. For one, we just haven't ever had a mantel or any place that made sense to decorate seasonally. Second, seasonal decor was just an extra expense that we didn't need.

That said, over the weekend, we moved the buffet that matches our hutch inside from the garage. We've never had it inside before because the three different colorings of wood between the buffet, our table, and the cabinets drove me crazy. Plus, we had "inherited" the table from when Justin and his siblings were growing up, and it was already pretty big for the space. I've always hated that table even more than I hated the buffet/hutch, but Justin loves/loved it. He did agree to let me paint it, but it still didn't solve the problem of not being the right size or shape for the space. Also, the table is just starting to fall apart--the chairs are losing their support spindles, and the finish is totally worn down.

After the cabinets were painted, we talked a lot about the kitchen/dining area, and I suggested to Justin that if we had a long rectangular table, I thought the buffet would fit inside and free up some garage space for him. And then, I suggested building a farmhouse table. And after a few months, I think Justin is down for that plan, so we brought the buffet inside over the weekend.

And now, I also have the perfect spot for seasonal decor. The only problem was that we're on a tight budget (as always), and I didn't really have much in terms of a base to start from. But yesterday, I made it my mission to decorate the buffet for fall for less than $30. Here's what I came up with:

I'd still like to add something that says "Give Thanks", but haven't found quite what I'm looking for yet. It's kind of funny though--in real life, I almost feel like there's too much going on already, but it doesn't look that way in the photo at all! Anyway, I spent $5 on two yards of muslin for the runner, $5 for the blue and turquoise "bouquet", $10 for the candle holder, and $4 for spray paint to paint the wine bottles. I also made a fabric flower bouquet out of fabric that I already had.

They are so easy to make--you just cut out large circles of fabric, and then use a needle and thread to stitch all the way around the perimeter of the circle. Pull the two ends of the string together, knot, and cut the ends. And, TA-DA, you have a flat flower disc. Then, I just put some hot glue on the back of each flower disc and attached a stick to each. If you want a cleaner look, you can also hot glue buttons/pearls to the center of each flower. I think I may make it my goal to do a new fabric flower bouquet for each season.

And for the table, here's what I'm thinking, but with white benches that could be pushed underneath for more room:

Source: remodelaholic.com via Meredith on Pinterest

BQOTD- Family Time

2011-11-07T08:00:00.000-08:00

Our co-ed softball season is over now (we finished 4th this year in B minor league, which is much better than we did last year, or even Spring season in C league!). I'm a little bit sad, but also a little bit relieved--we've basically had a game every Sunday night since May. It will be nice to actually have those nights at home for awhile...because we're way too busy during the week. As it is, we usually only average one night at home during the week. The rest of the week, we're running all over the place to Bible Study, band practice, building the recording studio, photo shoots, J's men's softball league, and all kinds of other things that we find ourselves committed to. And weekends? Weekends are just busy, always, no matter what. This past Saturday was the first time we spent more than half the day at home in I-don't-know-how-long. And it was glorious.

Sometimes, I crave a slower pace. Less running. But, it's hard, because we truly feel passionate about all the activities we're involved in, and I'm not sure what could possibly be cut out. We've been talking about scheduling a designated "family night" where for the most part, we just don't do anything other than spend some time at home together. I hope we do follow through and do that--I think we all need it!

Today's BQOTD- How many nights per week, on average, do you spend at home with your family? Do you have a designated "family night" or anything like that?

BQOTD- How Do You Want to Be Portrayed? | Fall '11 Blog Bible Study Week 8

2011-11-06T13:50:00.000-08:00

Honestly, I'm having a hard time doing this study of Paul right now. Shortly after beginning this study, some of the moms at Mom's Group began doing Sheila Walsh's The Shelter of God's Promises (which is great, by the way!), and I joined them. It quickly became overwhelming for me to try and do the homework for both every day, but I tried to keep up with it. Often, this meant doing three or four days worth of devotionals on Friday morning and then trying to throw together a post. And those posts? Not the highest in terms of comments. I wish I could say that I didn't care in the slightest about the number of comments that I receive on posts, but the honest-to-goodness truth is that sometimes I do. I try not to. When I first decided to start this series, I prayed that I wouldn't, because it's not supposed to be about me. But sometimes I do care. This wasn't meant to be a pity party, but just to tell you that I'm human, and I struggle with this stuff sometimes, just like we all do. I'm sure that in a few months, I'll look back and see a lesson in all of this, but I'm just not there quite yet, ha!

Anyway, I picked up the Paul book this afternoon and flipped it open to where I thought I was supposed to be had I been keeping up like I was supposed to. I landed on Day 50, where Beth Moore asked the question, "What might be some parting words or themes you'd like to leave behind on those who follow you? What are the most important warnings and encouragements to pass on?"

She wasn't talking about blogging specifically, but I think it kind of relates, no? Which brings me to my Burning Question of the Day:

For those of you who blog, how do you hope that you're portraying yourself to your blog readers? Have you thought about it? Do you intentionally try to strive for something specific?

Personally, I hope that I'm portraying just what the "About Me" section on the sidebar says. I hope that I come across as someone who loves her husband, her daughter, and her family. As someone who is a mom, but more than that too. As someone who is passionate about photography, and loves spending Thursday nights curled up on the couch watching Bones. As someone who has recently re-prioritized faith in her life, and wants to learn and grow in that way. As someone who is real about her struggles (and definitely isn't perfect!), but doesn't complain too much...someone who can find the blessings and the hope. I know I don't get it right all the time, but I hope I do more often than not...

What about you?

Who Is She? Pt. 2

2011-11-06T12:47:00.000-08:00

Yet another 5 minute free write, jumping right into where yesterday's post left off. Oddly enough, I have never, ever gotten so many spam comments as I did on yesterday's post!

............................................................................................

"Here's your steak sir. Again, I'm so sorry about the mix-up in the kitchen," She said.

"This is just unacceptable. My family's out for a nice dinner, and you can't even manage to cook a simple steak correctly!"

"I apologize. I'm happy to get my manager for you if you'd like."

"What I'd like, is for you to do your job," the customer snapped.

She paused for a minute, thinking. Was this it? She could walk out the door, get into her car, and just drive. Isn't that her dream? To start over where no one knows her? She'd need money eventually, but surely she could find a job wherever she ended up. Most appealing of all, she'd never have to look into anyone's eyes and see pity. Or worse yet, pain at the memory of Todd.

............................................................................................

Because It's NaBloPoMo

2011-11-05T20:49:00.000-07:00

Free-write for five minutes using this prompt as the beginning:

Behind her, the noise escalated.

............................................................................................

Behind her, the noise escalated. The restaurant was less crowded than usual, but somehow, much more noisy. The noise felt cumbersome--it would have been a minor annoyance all by itself, but coupled with the rest of her day, it was just too much. She wanted nothing more than to put on a pair of fuzzy socks, her favorite sweatshirt, and to crawl into bed. But, she had another three hours left of her shift. Another three hours where her income depended on a happy, upbeat mood. She bit the inside of her cheek, and walked back to the table, hoping that it wasn't too easy for them to see how she really felt.

............................................................................................

It's been a long time since I've done any sort of free-write, or even used a creative writing prompt. I had kind of forgotten how fun it can be to see where the words take you.

This NaBloPoMo thing is new to me. Blogging every day, including weekends, is new to me. Already (a meager five days into things), I'm sometimes finding myself feeling like I don't have anything left to say. So maybe, this is it. Maybe, when I don't feel like I have anything left to say, maybe I free-write for five minutes about this person above--I don't know who she is yet, but it might be kind of fun to find out.

This post brought to you by the letters NaBloPoMo.

Paging Doctor Google...or Not.

2011-11-04T18:29:00.000-07:00

I had a doctor's appointment this morning--I've had this little bitty bruise on my back for a couple of months now. It's the type of thing that I won't notice for a couple of months, and then I'll lean back in a chair and feel pain and think, "That's STILL there?!" I wasn't sure if it was from softball--maybe where the bat hits my back when I swing? But the bruise is so small (less than a half an inch), and the placement isn't quite right. Anyway, I told Justin that I'd just feel better if someone laid eyes on it, so I saw the nurse practitioner this morning.

She looked at it, and said, "Hmmmm. I've never seen anything like that before." Then, she called in my doctor. He said, "I've never even seen anything quite like that, even in textbooks," (I laughed, because that's just so me--I'm the girl whose appendicitis went undiagnosed because my appendix was in the wrong place. I'm the girl who had a breast tumor removed at age 19. I'm just kind of a medical anomaly.) The nurse said, "Yeah, and it doesn't blanch. It's sort of like a hematoma under the skin." They referred me to a dermatologist--they warned me that it would probably take 3 months to get in, but happily, the derm had an opening on the 18th. And largely, I didn't worry too much about it for the rest of the day...

And then. THEN. When I got home tonight, I consulted Dr. Google. Why do I do this? I *know* it's never a good idea, but I do it anyway. I Googled something about a hematoma that doesn't blanch, and what was starting me back in the face was enough to scare anybody's socks off--Leukemia. Meningitis. Lupus. All sorts of other things that I just don't want to deal with. And the worry and fear just came pouring in. Even though nothing really looked like my unique little bruise, it seems that anything that doesn't blanch is bad, bad, bad....according to Dr. Google anyway.

Why in the world do I think that Google will be able to diagnose me more effectively than the doctor who has literally known me my entire life? Better than a doctor who knows all my weird history, and was literally the only medical professional in my corner back during the tumor debacle?

More importantly, why don't I pray if I'm worried? I've seen firsthand in my life over the past year what a difference God has made in terms of my worries and fears, so why don't I turn to Him first, rather than Google?

Dr. Google, I think it's time we break up. Hopefully this time it's for good.

Snippets/Confessions

2011-11-03T18:09:00.000-07:00

-I couldn't get Lizzy down for a nap until almost 4pm today. It was a battle royale, but I won. And because she went down for such a late nap, I'm seriously thinking about taking her to Justin's softball game tonight, which doesn't start until 8:30pm. I feel like it's going to be another battle royale to get her to bed tonight, and I just don't want to do it alone. On the other hand, I just feel badly keeping her out that late.

-Once J's game is done, we are staying up to watch the season premiere of Bones. I don't care if we have to stay up until MIDNIGHT to do so.

-I took this recipe to Mom's Group today, and it was glorious. And so easy.

Source: stamps4fun.blogspot.com via Meredith on Pinterest

And the perfect comfort food for a Mom's Group that I cried all the way through--we had an amazing woman named JoLayne come and talk about her faith. And, about her daughter Faith who died in September from cancer. JoLayne is now trying to raise awareness about childhood cancer as well as funds for research. I told JoLayne that while this is a small thing, if she ever wanted to write about what she's doing here on the blog, she's always welcome. And I hope she does--there were so many things I didn't know, and I'm sure most people don't.

-I've got two prayer requests for you guys. First, my-brother-in-law Justin's grandpa died today. I know his whole family would appreciate your prayers for comfort. Second, one of my best friends Kaitlin just recently found out that her husband Jesse is deploying for the third time. Very soon. I think they could use prayers all the way around too.

Your Last Meal

2011-11-02T07:23:00.000-07:00

If you knew that whatever you ate next would be your last meal, what would you want it to be?

It's funny--there's a fancy restaurant here locally that my family always goes to on Christmas Eve, and what I order there is pretty close to what I think my ideal "last meal" would be--with just a few tweaks to sauces, dressings, and sides, I think it would be the perfect last meal.

First, a blue cheese creme brulee appetizer, spread over warm sourdough bread. I'd eat a whole order by myself. Then, a garden salad with more blue cheese, caramelized pecans, and raspberry vinaigrette dressing. Fresh squeezed strawberry lemonade to drink. Next, a medium rare steak with a sweet potato, and fresh fruit salad on the side. And heck, more bread and butter. And then, raspberry cobbler with homemade vanilla bean ice cream.

I think this meal would also be my own "if you had to eat one thing for the rest of your life" answer. It's just good stuff. I find myself re-creating a simpler, less frilly version of this dinner often! If Justin wanted to cook a meal that would make me swoon, this would be it.

That said, I also think that your "last meal" depends on who you're sharing it with--because let's face it, food tastes a whole lot better when you're eating it with people you love.

What about you guys?

This post brought to you by the letters NaBloPoMo.

BQOTD: Favorite Thanksgiving Dish

2011-11-01T07:14:00.000-07:00

I have this "thing" about holidays--I don't want to talk about Thanksgiving until Halloween is over. Likewise, I don't do the Christmas thing until we've gotten through Thanksgiving. My ONE exception to this rule is all things peppermint (i.e. peppermint lattes, peppermint ice cream, and *hopefully* Dairy Queen will resurrect peppermint Blizzards from their early grave this year), which are acceptable all through Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Anyway...we're now through Halloween, so for today's Burning Question of the Day, I'm wondering:

What's your favorite Thanksgiving dish? Are you all about the turkey? The cranberry sauce? Do you love that good old green bean casserole? Pumpkin pie? Tell me about it (and if you're feeling compelled to share the recipe, I won't complain!).

Justin and I live close to both sets of our parents, and so we do our best to alternate spending dinner with one set and dessert with the other. Sometimes we end up at one person's house for dinner/dessert two years in a row (either accidentally, or to try and see whoever has to work on that day), but so far, everyone has been really nice and not fussed about it at all. Anyway, I tell ya all this because Justin and I joke that we both prefer when we eat dinner at OUR parents' house, because it's Thanksgiving like we remember it as a kid. Don't get me wrong--both my mom and Justin's mom are great cooks, but they just each have their own recipes, and we remember the ones we grew up with!

Anyway, I still love the classic green bean casserole--my mom uses golden mushroom soup instead of cream of mushroom, but to me, that dish just SCREAMS Thanksgiving!

One of My Favorite Photo Shoots To Date

2011-10-28T09:17:00.000-07:00

Almost two years ago, Hollie called me about taking photos of her sweet 6 month old daughter Madi. I was so nervous--it was the first time I'd taken photos of someone that wasn't family! But Hollie and Madi were great, and I've done several photos for them over the years.

A couple months ago, Hollie called me again, and showed me this photo on Pinterest that she wanted to use as inspiration for the next session:

Source: pinksugarphotography.typepad.com via Meredith on Pinterest

{PS- If you aren't familiar with Pink Sugar Photography, be sure to click on the source link--AMAZING}

I don't mind at all when people show me inspiration photos that they love prior to a photo shoot, but there's always that balance as a photographer from trying to take that inspiration without copying the other photographer too closely--'cause let's face it, even if imitation is the highest form of flattery, no one likes to be copied exactly. But on the other hand, we all draw inspiration from each others' work...nearly every photographer has a "Photos I Love" board on Pinterest, right?

So, when someone brings me an inspiration photo, what I usually try to do is talk with the person to narrow down what the person loves--is it the lighting, the poses, the type of location, the outfits, etc in order to be able to capture the feel without being too literal. For Hollie, I think it was mostly the field and the warm lighting that she loved, so I decided to use my brother and sister-in-law's back property that I used for the self-portraits for Lee Jeans and go with a sunset shoot. And then, Oregon weather didn't cooperate at all, and gave us cloudy and overcast for the next two weeks. Once we had a day of sun, we jumped on it, and this is what I came up with...I think (hope--you tell me!) that it does a good job capturing the "feel" of Hollie's inspiration photo without being too literal:

BQOTD + Fall '11 Blog Bible Study Week 7

2011-10-28T08:26:00.000-07:00

Day 42 of Beth Moore's book discusses Acts 19:1-7, wherein Paul encounters a group of believers who says they hadn't heard of the Holy Spirit, nor received it when they were baptized by John. Paul then has them re-baptized in the name of Christ, and they begin speaking in tongues. This verse is definitely divisive among Christians at times, and Beth Moore posed the question, "What do you do with those knotty doctrinal questions, ones with outspoken proponents on either side? How do you deal with things you don't understand?"

I thought this was a really interesting question that totally appealed to my nerdy inner Sociologist. I often feel like we as a society speak about "Christians" in general--and while our core beliefs are (usually) the same, there are over 38,000 different denominations of Christianity...in other words, there are a lot of different beliefs that all reside under the umbrella of Christianity. I tried to find a chart that compared what some of the larger denominations believe in terms of baptism, the rapture, whether or not salvation can be lost, and some other "hot button" issues just for the sake of comparison, but I had a heck of a time finding anything...

To me, the "knotty doctrinal issues" don't tend to get me super worked up. Justin and I go to a different church for Bible Study because our church didn't offer a Bible Study for young married couples at the time that we started going. The church we go to for Bible Study has different beliefs than our own in terms of communion, baptism, and some of that, but it just doesn't bother either of us, because we don't consider those things matters of salvation. Both churches believe that Jesus is the son of the triune God and that he died on the cross to pay for our sins. We both believe that it's by grace, through faith that we're saved. To Justin and I, that's the major thing, not whether a person is dunked or sprinkled during baptism. And actually, I think it's been a good thing for us to participate in a church with a different denomination, because it's made me/us really research what the Lutheran church believes in terms of all those "hot button" issues--something I *thought* I knew, but I actually didn't.

So, for today's Burning Question of the Day, I'm curious:

BQOTD: If you identify yourself as being Christian, do you also identify with a particular denomination as well? Just for the purposes of this discussion, we'll consider "non-denominational" churches a "denomination" as well. Do you feel like you have a good grasp of what your church believes in terms of "hot-button" issues such as baptism, communion, abortion, the rapture, etc?

As always, I'm not asking because I have any desire to "convert" you to the Lutheran faith. You should know by now that that's not how I roll. I'm just curious how we all approach our individual faiths!

Fall into Fall (and bonus, a funny Justin story).

2011-10-27T15:38:00.000-07:00

There's this great pumpkin patch near us. We went last year with Ryan & Renee (and kiddos), and again this year with them and my parents and sister as well. I hope it becomes an annual tradition! I love me some family traditions :)

I was a bad mom/aunt this year and hardly took any photos, especially of the cousins. I don't know what happened--I guess I just plum forgot. Oh well, such is life.

Lizzy loved riding the "neigh-see". The first time, they put her on a little donkey. The second time, she told them no when they took her over to the little mini donkey, and said, "No.I want this one. Big." Don't get it twisted people, she's a big girl now.

You know what's really funny? I'm pretty positive Justin wore the exact same flannel shirt when we went last year. Hang on, let me to a photo hunt...

Yep. Same shirt. :)

I am DYING laughing right now. It cracks me up because I know he isn't doing it on purpose, but Justin does this ALL THE TIME, with wearing the same outfit for the same event two (or more) years in a row. LOL.

4th of July 2010

4th of July 2009:

Oh wait! Aaaannnndddd Christmas Eve 2008:

Christmas Eve 2009:

Oh babe, you make me laugh!

Shabby Apple Jewelry Winner...

2011-10-25T16:28:00.000-07:00

And the winner of the Shabby Apple Through the Looking Glass necklace is:

Congrats Laura T!

BQOTD: Halloween

2011-10-25T07:21:00.000-07:00

Growing up, we always celebrated Halloween--at least I did until I was in 4th grade and 5'8" and people told me I was "too old" to go Trick or Treating. I cried.

Traumatic childhood moments aside, I maybe had one or two friends who didn't celebrate Halloween, but none that I can really remember. The same goes for college at PLU (Pacific Lutheran)...I'm sure there were people who didn't celebrate Halloween, but I don't remember anyone specifically or any specific reasons why they didn't celebrate. Justin has told me that he's experienced essentially the same thing growing up--Halloween was always celebrated, and he didn't really know many (if any) families who didn't celebrate.

But, I've noticed quite a few blog friends make reference to the fact that they don't celebrate Halloween. I've noticed quite a few posts like {this one} taking one side or the other as to whether or not Christians should celebrate the day. I've seen some other people talk about not celebrating Halloween because they dislike the politically uncorrectness of a lot of Halloween costumes. And it has recently occurred to me that the percentage of people who choose not to celebrate Halloween (for a variety of reasons, not just religious) is probably closer to the percentage of people who do celebrate the day than I realized. And y'all know that I was a Sociology major in college, and so I'm probably more interested in hearing why people do the mundane things that they do than most...so, for today's Burning Question of the Day, I'm curious:

Does your family celebrate Halloween? Why or why not?

*Note: Let's all please play nice and be respectful of each other and one another's beliefs. I'm just genuinely curious, and hope we can cultivate an environment where people feel comfortable enough to share why they do what they do.

Just A Reminder

2011-10-24T07:30:00.000-07:00

I've had a couple of people tell me that {this post}for my Shabby Apple Jewelry giveaway never showed up in their Google Reader. So, I thought I'd post again today in hopes that it reaches everyone--you have until tomorrow to enter!

Click on through if you want to win some beautiful jewelry from Shabby Apple!

Snippets

2011-10-21T08:23:00.000-07:00

-Sorry, no Bible Study today. I'm behind and overwhelmed, and last night I chose to go to J's softball game rather than stay home an do a week's worth of Bible Study in one night.

-I seriously feel like I spend 85% of the day cleaning lately, but yet my house is still a DISASTER. How does that happen?

-Lately, when Lizzy is mad that she's being put to bed when she doesn't want to be, she takes off all her clothes and diaper. Sometimes, she goes to the bathroom in the crib. This has happened three times in the past two days. She's gotten out of a footed sleeper, a onesie and leggings, and jeans and a shirt. I am sort of at the end of my rope here. I don't know what to do other than put duct tape over the diaper velcro when I lay her down, but I feel like that could come back to bite me in the butt somehow.

-I'm having trouble staying motivated to do Turbo Fire. It's been a month. I've been averaging 5-6 days a week. It's HARD. I just took progress pictures and literally saw no difference. But, I'm just the type of person with the type of metabolism where I'm just going to have to work out almost every day no matter what for the rest of my life. I'm kind of irritated about it though. Especially when I have a husband who can drink soda, eat candy, chips, and copious amounts of fast food, and lose weight without even trying. Must have something to do with that manual labor job, eh?

-I've been on a total book kick lately. This month, in addition to Love at First Bark I've read:

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
Food Rules by Michael Pollan
Sweethearts by Sara Zarr
Friendship Bread by Darien Gee
Dogs of Babel by Carolyn Parkhurst

I don't know that I'm going to write reviews for all these, but if anyone is curious about any of these, I'm happy to tell you what I think!

Book Review: Love at First Bark

2011-10-20T07:45:00.000-07:00

image from BlogHer Book Club

I'll never forget my first upper-division college English class. As a self-proclaimed bookworm, I had already read most of the books we covered in the intro classes, and I was thrilled to be getting into something more meaty. Within minutes of purchasing the books on the syllabus, I had already begun reading, even though our first class meeting was months away. I was THAT excited.

The first book that my professor assigned was narrated by a dog. Don't ask me what it was called, because I think I've blocked it from my memory. It was the worst book I've ever read. EVER. It was painful to finish. I absolutely hated it, and couldn't even see what redeeming qualities someone else might find in the book as I usually can.

I'm a little bit ashamed to admit it, but since that experience, I've avoided "dog-books" like the plague. I think I just figured that I clearly wasn't one of those "dog people", and I'd never understand books that revolved around them. Marley & Me? Nope, didn't read it. I may or may not have avoided The Art of Racing in the Rain simply because it had a dog on the cover. However, for BlogHer Book Club, I was recently sent Love at First Bark: How Saving A Dog Can Sometimes Help You Save Yourself by Julie Klam. Truth be told, I had almost skipped participating this round because it was a "dog book"...but I'm always telling people that one of my favorite things about BlogHer Book Club is that it encourages me to read books I might not have read otherwise. So, I bit the bullet and agreed to read and review the book.

Shortly after it arrived, I sat down with Love at First Bark as I was getting ready to rock Lizzy to sleep for her nap. And honest-to-God, I didn't get up again until I'd finished the book. For the first time, Julie Klam's book didn't feel like a "dog book"--it felt like a witty, hilarious, lovely memoir that happened to include characters who were dogs right along with the human ones.

My favorite story in the book was Morris-the-Pitbull, whom Julie and her husband Paul happened upon on the street, tied to a lightpost. Upon asking around, they discovered that this particular tagless Pitbull had been tied up for quite some time. They quickly began calling him Morris, and Julie began trying to find him a home, Paul reluctantly staying with her, probably partly to ensure that Morris didn't come home with them. But unexpectedly, Paul and Julie, who had sort of been passing through their marriage like ships in the night, reconnected in a way that they haven't in a long time. I mean, haven't we all been there in relationships? In a place where you're just not connecting like you used to? And then suddenly, you get involved in something that helps you reconnect? Gives you something to talk about again?

Now that I've read Love at First Bark, I think that my prior aversion to most "dog books" (excluding the one I read in college English, which was just BAD) was that I simply couldn't relate. While we had dogs growing up, I felt rather ambivalent about them. I didn't love them. I honestly didn't even feel affection for them--they were just those two annoying things that barked at night and woke me up. I simply haven't loved a dog like a member of my family. Although I've never personally encountered that kind of love for a dog, for the first time when reading Love at First Bark, I could see how it's possible, and hope I'm fortunate enough to experience it someday.

Join the discussion about Love at First Bark over at BlogHer Book Club!

Disclosure Statement: This was a paid review for BlogHer Book Club, but as always, all opinions expressed are 100% my own.

Letter to Lizzy- Twenty & Twenty One Months

2011-10-19T07:31:00.000-07:00

Dear Lizzy-Loo,

Just within the last couple of weeks, you have definitely entered into the "do self" phase. In fact, you want to pick out your own outfit almost every day (you picked the outfit in the above photo and "styled" yourself, actually), and get very upset if I misunderstand you or if you just can't wear what you have in mind. Yesterday, you threw a 25 minute temper tantrum because I could only find your dark pink headband, and you wanted the light pink one. Your dad and I are trying to find that balance between teaching you that you can't always have everything you want at the very instant you want it and also just going ahead and fixing what we know is making you mad. It's a fine line to walk sometimes baby girl!

Milestones:
-You can count to 10, but can't necessarily count objects (i.e. if I ask you how many strawberries are on your plate, you'll just count to whatever number you feel like counting to).
-You correctly identify pink and blue most times. You correctly identify purple, black, green, and orange maybe 70% of the time.
-You are just starting to string together sentences, with the most common one being "Mama, WATCH ME!"
-You're really interested in climbing and playing like the big kids at the playground. You do NOT want anyone to help you at all, ever.

Funny Stories This Month:
-Of course, there's the Frog/Perry the Platypus slipper story.
-Another good story was when we were in the second-hand kid store. We passed the shoe section, and you gasped and said, "Mama, I LOVE shoes!"
-You and Logan were in the car, and you were being a stinker, trying to kick him (you are still rear-facing and he is in a booster). You couldn't quite reach him to kick him, so you just started pointing your toe at him, teasing. He didn't like that, so he licked your foot...and WHOO BOY, that made you MAD.
-We don't listen to rap that often, but I was listening to it the other day in the car. Ever since then, you've been "rapping" Jesus Loves Me".
-I tried to teach you to say "Trick or Treat" the other day, but you just walk around holding your pumpkin and saying "Twinkle Twinkle!"

Things That Were Hard:
-You've really been testing boundaries these past two months. You'll sometimes be doing something that you know you're not supposed to do, and say "Look mama, NO NO!" or, when I'll ask if you're supposed to be doing something (such as hitting when you're mad), you'll respond, "I want timeout," like you KNOW it's naughty, but you've decided to do it anyway. Not gonna lie, that's HARD.
-You've been getting your molars, so you've been VERY whiny this month.

Things I Love:
-Rocking you to sleep for your naps. It's still working well, and I LOVE that snuggle time, so we're still doing it!
-How much better you're able to communicate this month.
-You're finally interested in reading books again this month!
-At bible Study yesterday, the childcare workers told me that you are a GREAT helper. You always ask to wipe off the table after snack, help clean up toys, and like to sing to the babies as well.

Shabby Apple Jewelry Giveaway

2011-10-18T06:00:00.000-07:00

Y'all know Shabby Apple, right? THE go-to shop for beautiful dresses? {Their current Academia collection totally makes the not-so-secret book nerd in me swoon}. Well, they also have some pretty incredible jewelry and other accessories too...and the fine folks at Shabby Apple have offered to let me give this away to one of you lucky ducks:

Their Through the Looking Glass Necklace!

Now, here's the thing: while this necklace is beautiful just the way it is, it actually gets even better. See, it has a side clasp that allows you to slip something up to 4mm inside--like a photo, scrapbook paper, or a dried flower. Then, the glass has a fish-eye magnifying effect on whatever you've slipped inside! Cool, right? I love me a versatile piece of jewelry, and I'm jealous that y'all have the opportunity to win it!

Here's how to enter:
1. For your first entry, like Shabby Apple on Facebook. And just for kicks, I'd like to hear what you'd slip into the necklace if you were to win.
2 & 3. For your second and third entries, you can either follow Shabby Apple on Twitter, or follow their blog. You need to leave a separate comment for each action!!

Here's the fine print:
-This contest is open to US readers.
-The contest will remain open until Tuesday Oct 25th at 10am Pacific Time.
-The winner will be chosen via random.org
-You MUST have an email attached to your profile or leave an email address where you can be contacted.
-The winner will be contacted by email on the 25th and will have 72 hours to respond in order to claim their prize. If the winner has not responded within 72 hours, a new winner will be selected.

Another Potty Training Post

2011-10-17T09:50:00.000-07:00

Look, I totally understand that not everyone (mom or not) wants to read a whole post about potty training. I get it. I do. But, the thing is that we're sort of in the thick of it over here, and I could use some advice. So, if it's not your thing, you just might want to stop reading right now and come back tomorrow instead :)

So, a couple of months ago, Lizzy started to get really interested in the bathroom. She asked to sit on the toilet often, and sometimes actually went to the bathroom, which resulted in lots of applause, cheering, and both small and large treats (okay, honestly we just really wanted ice cream that one night and the bathroom accomplishment gave us an excuse). One day, she just stopped wanting to go or sit on the toilet altogether, so we didn't push it. She was like 19 months at the time, which is honestly just really early to begin with.

A few weeks ago, a friend gave us a bag of hand-me-downs, which included some training underwear (the thick ones) and other potty training stuff. Since seeing those, Lizzy has asked repeatedly to wear underwear. We had the whole talk about how when we wear underwear, we have to go potty on the toilet and such. We checked out the library books, and all that good stuff, and then as I mentioned last week, we decided to give it a shot.

We put her in the thick underwear to start. Although she had just sat on the toilet for like 15 minutes, literally minutes after we put on the underwear, she pooped. We talked about telling me before she goes to the bathroom, put the poop in the toilet, etc. Sat her on the toilet for a few minutes, got her down, put on a new pair of thick undies, and within three minutes, she had peed. Again, I told her it was okay, and I asked what she should do next time she felt like she might have to go potty, and she responded, "Tell mommy FORE" and then, "I want potty treat!"

Okay. This time, we put her in thin underwear, and I set the timer for 5 minutes, telling her that when it went off, it was time to sit on the potty. Timer went off. Sat her on the potty, she went pee. Big celebration, she got her small treat, and we were off to play again. I set the timer for half an hour this time. When the timer went off, Lizzy refused to sit on the potty. I figured she just didn't have to go, so I didn't push it, and set it for 10 more minutes. A few minutes later, she was dancing around, so I said, "Let's go sit on the potty!" she flipped out, and would NOT sit on the potty, and promptly peed in her underwear, and then laughed and said, "Lizzy no-no!"

At that point, we were out of underwear, so I told Lizzy that she'd have to wear a diaper until I washed her underwear, and she flipped out. And that's basically where we're at now--Lizzy wants to wear underwear, flips out if she has to wear a diaper, but also absolutely refuses to sit on the toilet, and seems to think nothing of going to the bathroom in her underwear. The same thing happened this morning--Lizzy asked to wear underwear, so we did that, but again, she refused to sit on the toilet, and went to the bathroom in her underwear like it was no big deal, and was LIVID when I finally told her that she had to wear a diaper because she wasn't telling me when she had to go potty.

If she's not ready, I'm fine with that. I don't need to potty train her now...I just thought that she seemed to be showing most of the signs that indicate they're "ready", and most of my friends have told me that if she's that excited about wearing underwear, she's ready. But seriously, if she's "ready", how in the world do I go about it from here?

Any advice? What do you think? Should we cool it for awhile? Should we capitalize on the interest in underwear? Do you have any tips?

BQOTD + Fall '11 Blog Bible Study Week 5

2011-10-14T07:13:00.000-07:00

This morning, Beth Moore got me thinking a bit about Bible Study in general. I think one of the questions she asked is a really interesting one, and so today, instead of yammering on and on about what I've learned this week, I want to pose the question that Beth Moore asked to y'all as a Burning Question of the Day:

She asked, "What are some of your most effective ways of digesting the Word? What have you found to be the best ways to keep it alive in your heart and fresh on your mind?" (p. 162)

In other words, how do you do this thing called Bible Study? Do you carve out a special time every morning? Is it something that you want to do more often, but struggle finding time for? Do you participate with a group? Do you tend to use guided studies, or just crack open the Bible and read? Do you have any books or resources that you've found particularly helpful in study? I'd love to hear from you!

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If you're new today, the Fall '11 Blog Bible study is a blog-based Bible-Study/Devotional designed for those of us who would like to take the amazing community of women bloggers online, and extend it to encouraging each other in faith. Right now, we'll be working through Paul: 90 Days on His Journey of Faith by Beth Moore. Each day has a short 1-2 page reading and a few reflection questions. Then, at the end of the week, I'll post some of my own thoughts/reflections, as well as a link-up. If you feel so inclined, I'd love for you to link up with your thoughts as well! If you'd like to join, but are just coming across this post now, it's not too late--just start whenever. And if you fall behind, no worries, and no guilt...we're all just doing the best we can, and none of us are perfect :)

Random Snippets

2011-10-13T08:07:00.000-07:00

-I've been on a book reading kick lately. I've seriously been devouring books left and right, and I'm totally bummed that I wasn't quick enough to make the cut for the next two BlogHer Book Club selections! Also, I was super excited that you can now check out library books on the Kindle...except that the entire state of Oregon shares the digital collection, and it's just like the regular library--they have one or two copies of each book, and only one person can have it checked out at a time. I must have looked up 50 books on my list yesterday, and all of them had a wait list, most of them were over 100 people long. What a bummer!

-This morning, we're actually home with no place to go for the first time in weeks. So, we're giving underwear a shot for Lizzy. She's wanted to go potty here and there for the past month or so, and has had some success, but nothing consistent. So, we're giving it a shot.

-That said, I'm hoping that I'm not setting us up for failure here, because I also wanted to do some major house cleaning this morning, and I don't want to get distracted and miss any cues that she might need to go. Maybe I just need to let the house disaster go this morning and try and tackle it once she's down for her nap...along with all the other things I want to get done like working out, taking a shower, all that good stuff heh!

-I'm officially a month into Turbofire. I took before pictures, so I really should take some in-progress ones now, but I'm scared to, lol!

- I think we may be done with the crib here soon. I've watched Lizzy try to climb IN it a few times recently, but I've never seen her try to climb out. Still, I think it will probably be sooner rather than later. We're still trying to decide whether to convert it to a toddler bed, or just pick up a twin somewhere and keep the crib as a crib for any future bambinos.

-I've had a few photography shoots lately, which is awesome. But, the bummer is that I've noticed that I haven't been taking photos at home all that often recently, which is really sad. I don't want photography to ever feel like "work".

A Series of Unfortunate Events...

2011-10-11T06:00:00.000-07:00

Oh y'all. The most hilarious-while-simultaneously-embarassing thing happened to me yesterday at Wal-Mart (ps- why does this kind of thing always happen in Wal-Mart?!) Here's some background:

Lizzy and Justin often watch Phineas & Ferb, which has a character named Perry-the-Platypus. Recently, Lizzy has taken to calling Perry by the last syllable of his name, "Pus".

Also, Lizzy's current pronunciation of "frog" sounds exactly like a particular four-letter word that starts with f and ends with k.

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So, today we were at Wal-Mart, passing by the shoe section. The endcap had a whole bunch of fuzzy slippers, which Lizzy spotted immediately.

"Elmo!" she happily yelled.

"CAR!" she screamed as we continued on our way.

And then, we came across the most unfortunate slipper display that could ever exist in my universe--a HUGE rack of Perry-the-Platypus slippers right next to a HUGE rack of Kermit-the-Frog slippers.

So my sweet Lizzy, so excited that she knew the words for both types of slippers, begins yelling "PUS! F#@K! PUS! F#@K!" at the top of her lungs in the middle of Wal-Mart.

I kid you not. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Obviously, most people around us didn't immediately recognize as "Platypus! Frog!", but rather what she was quite literally saying. Oh, if only you could have seen the looks we received...and she was so excited, that I couldn't for the life of me get her to stop.

And that, my friends, is how a series of unfortunate events resulted in me becoming the mama with the swearing toddler in the Super Wal-Mart.

It's okay, go ahead and laugh. I did :)

BQOTD: Coffee

2011-10-10T07:25:00.000-07:00

I think I may have already asked this once for the Burning Question of the Day, but if I have, it's been awhile...and so I'm going to ask it again!

Today, I'm curious--are you a coffee drinker? Do you brew it at home, or buy it somewhere? What's your drink of choice?

I used to buy it out a LOT while I was working (there was a coffee place next door), but now I usually make it at home. We go through coffee so fast that we usually just buy Folgers, but every once in awhile my sister will bring me coffee from Caribou, which is a real treat since we don't have Caribou out here! I'm a recent convert to real-dairy creamer, so I usually add that and I'm good to go.

If I happen to buy coffee, I usually buy from a local drive-through chain, and order a non-fat caramel latte...but as soon as they start rolling out the Peppermint Mochas for the holidays, I switch over to those!

Fall '11 Blog Bible Study: Week 4

2011-10-07T08:34:00.000-07:00

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It should come as no surprise that I'm behind. Again. Which is especially funny, since I gave myself a week's head-start just to hopefully avoid this very situation. But, here I am, trudging along--so obviously, if you're feeling guilty because you're behind, stop stressing. You're definitely not going to hear any admonishment from me--'cause I'm right there with you!

Source: bippityboppityboo.tumblr.com via Ashley on Pinterest

Source: google.com via Shannon on Pinterest

I'm doing another Bible Study with a bunch of the moms from Mom's Group (I've been so blessed to become involved in the past year!), and for that study, we're doing Sheila Walsh's Shelter of God's Promises (which is fantastic, btw). This past week, the promise that we were studying was The Promise of Confidence, with Romans 8:28 as the corresponding verse for the week.

Thinking about that verse, I couldn't help think about Esther--and the idea that perhaps she had been made queen "for such a time as this" (Esther 4:14). The idea that God had been working behind the scenes in her life for years to bring her to the very place that she was supposed to be. I don't believe that God caused the trouble and persecution that she was facing, but I absolutely believe that he can and did use that situation for good.

I see the same thing in Paul--that even in his youth, Saul experienced in Gamaliel a rare teacher who tempered the law with grace. As Saul grew older and began actively persecuting followers of Christ, God was still there, working behind the scenes on Saul's heart, so that if Saul would be willing to become Paul, Paul would be ready "for such a time as this". As Sheila Walsh commented in the last session I saw, "Even the acts that Satan uses to destroy us can be used by God for good." We can all be used "for such a time as this."

And for the first time this past week, I reflected on my own life, and how everything has worked together to bring me right where I am today. Looking back, reflecting, I can see how even some of the things that I've been really upset about in my life have ultimately worked out exactly as they needed to in order to bring me where I am today. I wonder, if even I may be here "for such a time as this"--for a purpose. I don't know what exactly that purpose is, but I hope that when the time comes, I'll be able to get out of the way and let God use me in the way HE intends, and not just the way that I expect.

Anybody still with me? What did you think this week? If you have a post to link up, let me know and I'll add the linky!

Feminism. WOHM. SAHM. Oh my!

2011-10-05T15:06:00.000-07:00

I was going to wait until tomorrow morning to post this, but it's been on my mind all day, and I just can't. This morning, I posted what I thought was a completely innocuous post. I was pretty surprised to receive the following comment:

I responded as neutrally as I could in the comments section of that post, because I think that a lot of it was just simply misdirected (i.e. that I do all the housework or that I order and prioritize my status as a wife and mother) but I've been thinking about it all day, and I have more to say. I apologize in advance if this is a bit of a ramble, but I hope y'all will take just a few minutes to read it--it's from the heart.

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Linda Hirshman wrote a book in 2006 called Get to Work: A Manifesto for Women of the World that is essentially summed up by the comment from "Concerned Feminist" above--that women who choose to stay at home rather than work are making equality more difficult for everyone else. Hirshman has also said that she doesn't buy into anecdotes from stay-at-home mothers and homemakers that it's the most fulfilling thing they could imagine doing, saying, "I would like to see a description of their daily lives that substantiates that position...One of the things I've done working on my book is to read a lot of the diaries online, and their description of their lives does not sound particularly interesting or fulfilling for a complicated person, for a complicated, educated person."

Now, I disagree with Hirshman for a plethora of reasons, the least of which being the air of entitlement and class-ism that she seems to espouse (i.e. those of us with educations shouldn't stay at home, but it's okay for us to pay the poor uneducated people to raise our children, because those people aren't very important or smart anyway), but this is nothing new--we all hear similar (albeit less judgmental) sentiments from both sides of the coin often, don't we? Stay-at-home moms tell their mom friends who work outside the home, "I just couldn't imagine letting anyone else raise my children." On the other hand, moms who work outside the home tell their stay-at-home mom friends, "I just don't know what you do with yourself all day while your son is at school! I'd be so bored!"

Right?

I get that we've already made the decision that we think is best for our family, and so it's hard to imagine doing anything to the contrary. But as in anything, there is no universal best--there's no "best" pair of jeans, no "best" meal, no "best" way to parent, no "best" decision in terms of staying home or continuing to work--there's only the right decision for us and for our families. What works for me might not work for you, but that doesn't mean that what I've chosen is wrong either.

I've been blogging since 2004, and during that time, I've had the privilege of getting to know some incredible and amazing men and women online.

I've gotten to know Molly, who has two beautiful boys and works out of the home full time. Guess what? She's doing the right thing, and she's a great mom.

I've gotten to know Leah, who also has two beautiful boys, and works out of the home right now in order that she'll be able to stay at home with her boys in the long-term. Guess what? She's doing the right thing, and she's a great mom.

I've gotten to know Emily, who has one little guy, and works part-time. Guess what? She's doing the right thing, and she's a great mom.

I've gotten to know Katie, who has a sweet little girl, and works part-time(?) from home. Guess what? She's doing the right thing, and she's a great mom.

And then there's me, who has a degree, used to work full-time, and now I'm staying home with Lizzy, and doing photography on the side. Guess what? I'm doing the right thing, and I'm a great mom too.

We're all doing the right thing, because we're all making the best decisions that we can for our families with the resources we have available to work with. I know, it sounds corny, but it's true. Whether we work full-time, part-time, out-of-the-home, in the home, or even consider staying-at-home work at all, we're doing what we think is right for our families, right now. Period. That's the best any of us can do.

Let's knock off pretending like we know how to best run each others lives, and focus on running our own, eh?

Balance Beam.

2011-10-05T08:14:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I had Dr. Drew's TV show Lifechangers on in the background while I was doing some cleaning and getting ready to get Lizzy and I out the door. They were talking about moms, and how sometimes we have a tendency to think of ourselves as either doing it perfectly, or failing. For a lot of us, there's no middle ground. Then, one of the experts said something to the effect of, "Sometimes, I feel like moms are competing with each other about whose to-do list is longer, but that's not what being a mom is about--it's relational."

Yeah, I'm totally aware of that. Heh. I think most of us moms get that--we need to talk to our kids, and read to our kids, and play with them. I know that, and I can do that. I want to do that. I'm cool with building blanket forts and coloring all day long, actually. For me, the issue is about how do we balance that relational aspect with the other aspect of having a household where things just need to get done as well? I feel like the cycle for me is that I spend a couple of weeks playing and having fun with Lizzy all day, and then I spend a week spending 85% of the day "catching up" and cleaning the house, and not playing with Lizzy very much. And then I'm irritated, because I *hate* cleaning, but I also need the house to be clean in order to be able to relax. And I know that people are all like, "Oh, you never get these moments back, don't worry about the house, you can fold laundry later." But the thing is, that we still need to have clean dishes to eat off of, and clean underwear crumpled up in the drawer.We all still have to do both.

There are seasons of my life where I feel like I'm doing it a little bit better. There are seasons in my life where I feel like I'm balancing. Juggling. Multi-tasking. And then there are seasons where I feel like, "Who IS this woman who forgets to go get her allergy shots, and can't even return a simple email in a timely manner?" Like I have a million things on my to-do list every day, but I'm only accomplishing half of them, and of those that I actually accomplish, I'm only doing half of them well. LOL.

And sometimes, when I feel overwhelmed, all I want to do is curl up on the couch during Lizzy's naptime and watch Parenthood. But then, when will I do the 100 other things that need to be done during that time?

What about you all? What do you think? Any tips for keeping that balance?

BQOTD: Fall Love/Hate

2011-10-04T07:34:00.000-07:00

Today's Burning Question of the Day is actually a two-fer: What's your favorite part of fall?

And, what's your least favorite part?

Breathtaking.

2011-09-30T11:27:00.000-07:00

Note: I know I'm supposed to be hosting the Bible Study today, but in dealing with Lizzy cutting her molars, I can't think clearly enough over the whining and screaming to write much of anything that's coherent. So instead, I leave you with some eye candy.

Southern Oregon is like a small wine mecca--there are TONS of vineyards, and lots of local wine. That said, Justin doesn't like wine, so I can count on one hand the number of times I've been out to a local winery to taste. Even though I like wine in general, I often feel like I'm picking blindly when I'm at the grocery store, unsure what I'll really like and what I won't.

One of my friends works in the wine industry here in Southern Oregon, and she asked me if I'd like to go out to one of the vineyards (Agate Ridge) to take some photos before the harvest this weekend. Of course, I jumped at the chance. And guys, it was breathtaking.

The proprietor, Kim, first took us through a tasting of the wine, which was such a treat in and of itself. Then, she gave us a glass of our favorite, and we hopped on the back of the tractor for a tour of the grounds.

It was incredible to hear Kim talk about all the different varieties of grapes, and to see how different the clusters look. I also loved getting to ask all the nerdy questions that I've always wondered about, like how many bottles of wine can be made out of one wooden barrel (35 cases).

Overall, it was just such a blessing, and absolutely breathtaking!

Book Review: Lunch Wars

2011-09-29T08:56:00.000-07:00

Image Credit: This is an actual school lunch from the USA submitted to www.whatsforschoollunch.blogspot.com | Link Here

I think many of us know that there's a problem with school food in the US. We've watched Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution. We've seen the menus at our local elementary schools and winced. Maybe it has affirmed for you why your child will always take a lunch from home (that was my first thought too). But here's the thing: the USDA says that in 2009, they provided free hot lunch to 31 million children per day through the free and reduced lunch program. Should those kids, who depend on the school's hot lunch, have to eat like that every day? Especially when we could do better without raising the cost? For me personally, the idea of my nation's kiddos (even kiddos that aren't my own) receiving the above meal for lunch most days gets me fired up. But, I felt like I didn't fully understand the politics and policies that got us where we are today...let alone how to exert change.

image credit

Amy Kalafa's new book Lunch Wars- How to Start a School Food Revolution and Win the Battle for Our Children's Health does just that--explains the policies behind school food. For example, Kalafa explains, "[F]rom 1995 to 2005, our Farm Bill allotted 74 percent of government agricultural subsidies to meat and dairy outfits, 13 percent for grains, 10 percent for sugar, oil, startch, and alcohol, 1.9 percent for nuts and legumes, and .37 percent to subsidize fruits and vegetables," (p. 127).

Kalafa (quoting food policy professor Marion Nestle) also explains, "When the pressure started coming on the USDA to provide healthy meals, the USDA went into a conflict of interest. It can't really be an agency that is meant to promote the consumption of American sugars and American beef and be in a situation where it's providing menus that cut down on high fat meats and cut down on sugars. So it's stuck between a rock and a hard place. So this is politics. And it's the ugliest kind of politics being fought over our kids' health," (p. 126).

Happily, there are also case studies of many schools who are now working outside the box to create healthier lunches for their kiddos. Many of them just seemed like such no-brainers to me, that I couldn't help but ask, "Why aren't we doing this everywhere?" For example, you may or may not be familiar with the idea that all across the nation, many farmers are being paid by the government not to grow on their land. One forward thinking state decided that instead of paying the farmers not to grow, they'd pay them the same amount to grow produce specifically for school lunches. I mean, DUH. That just makes sense--it provides the kids with healthier meals, and it also ensures that a portion of the billions of dollars the state spends on school lunches each year remains in the local economy, and because the farmers were being paid that amount anyway, it reduces the state's overall budget. Everybody wins...so why aren't we doing it everywhere?!

Our family had already been making some shifts in the way that we approach food, but I think that this book may have sent us over the edge. We've been asking questions (happily, the school that Lizzy will attend when she's older has already broken away from the USDA's food provision and makes their own meals from scratch on-site). We've been thinking and talking about changing the way that we buy meat. I'm more convicted than ever about the importance of our backyard garden, not just because it cuts down on our grocery bill, but also because it is so important for Lizzy to see where food comes from and how it's grown.

Overall?

What do you think? Do school lunches concern you? Have you done anything about it? Join the conversation about school lunches over on BlogHer Book Club!

Disclosure Statement: This was a paid review for BlogHer Book Club, but as always, all opinions expressed are 100% my own.

Snippets + BHG Giveaway Winner!

2011-09-28T08:30:00.000-07:00

- Lizzy appears to be cutting her 2 year molars. Whoo Boy. We're talking fever, serious fussiness, etc. And yesterday? I changed like eight poopy diapers before noon. One day last week, I literally held her for her entire nap simply because she had been such a bear that day that I thought we could both use the snuggles. Also, all of a sudden she looks so much older to me.

-We watch Lizzy's cousin Logan on Monday and Wednesdays before he goes to afternoon Pre-K. On Wednesdays, all the kids wear a specific blue shirt for chapel, and Lizzy has definitely picked up on this, and noticed that she doesn't have a blue shirt like her older cousins and everyone else. The only problem? Right now, her rendition of "shirt" is "shit". So, almost every Wednesday when we get to church to drop Logan off, she runs through the church yelling, "I want blue shit!" at the top of her lungs. Awesome.

-The last two Saturdays, Justin's band has had practice on Friday night, and then a concert on Saturday, which is AWESOME for them, but has also definitely made it feel like we haven't had a weekend. I'm excited to have a weekend with nothing on the schedule this coming weekend!

-I'm almost three weeks into TurboFire now, and I do like it, even if I feel like an uncoordinated idiot most of the time trying to do the choreography.

-Let's just get right down to what you all are REALLY interested in, shall we? The WINNER of the Better Homes & Gardens New Decorating Book courtesy of Wiley Books is:

Congrats! Please shoot an email to labuenavidablog [at] gmail [dot] com with your shipping info (please include your phone number for the shipping label)!

On Books.

2011-09-27T08:22:00.000-07:00

What do Twilight, the Merriam-Webster Collegiate Dictionary, and The Grapes of Wrath have in common? All three books were banned and/or challenged from school or public libraries. Just for the record, all three have been challenged within the past 10 years. For example, the Merriam-Webster Collegiate Dictionary was removed from the Menifee, Calif. School District in 2010 after a child found the term "oral sex". The district is considering a permanent classroom ban of the dictionary.

This week is the American Library Association's Banned Books Week. About Banned Books Week, the ALA says:

"Sex, profanity, and racism remain the primary categories of objections, and most occur in schools and school libraries. Frequently, challenges are motivated by the desire to protect children. While the intent is commendable, this method of protection contains hazards far greater than exposure to the “evil” against which it is leveled. U.S. Supreme Court Justice William Brennan, in Texas v. Johnson, said, 'If there is a bedrock principle underlying the First Amendment, it is that the Government may not prohibit the expression of an idea simply because society finds the idea itself offensive or disagreeable.' Individuals may restrict what they themselves or their children read, but they must not call on governmental or public agencies to prevent others from reading or seeing that material."

Requests to ban books from school and public libraries still abound. From 2009-2011, here are some of the books that were attempted to be removed from the shelves:

Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson: Challenged in Republic, Mo. schools in 2010 because it "glorifies drinking, cursing, and premarital sex." Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut was also challenged in the same district for the same reasons last year.

Brave New World by Aldous Huxley: Challenged in Glen Burnie, Md. in 2010 at the high school level because of concerns about sexually explicit content. It was also challenged (but retained) in 2011 at a Seattle Wash. high school because a parent complained that it lacked "literary value which is relevant in today's multicultural society."

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time by Mark Haddon: Removed from the Lake Fenton, Mich. summer reading program in 2010 after parents complained that it contained foul language.

The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls: Challenged at the William S. Hart Union School District in Saugus, Calif. in 2009 from the required summer reading for the honors program. The challenge specified concerns about profanity, criticisms of Christianity, and recounts of sexual abuse as some of the reasons.

As you probably know by now, I'm a huge bookworm, and I totally agree with the statement made by the ALA about banned books--that we may restrict what we read or what our children read, but we may not attempt to leverage our concerns to prevent others from reading that book that we're concerned about. When we ask the government to censor and edit what we and our children are allowed to read, it's a slippery slope, a la Fahrenheit 451 (which coincidentally is often on the Banned Books List). Further, I'd suggest that as parents, there are often better ways to approach our concerns about the content of a particular book than by just saying, 'You can't read that.' Heck, my parents never restricted what I read growing up, but I can tell you that I read most of the books on the "Most Frequently Challenged" list as a teenager simply because they were challenged and/or banned at the request of other people's parents.

Anyway, this week, I'm celebrating some of the amazing literature that has been challenged and/or banned from public and school libraries over the years. I'm thankful to have the ability and the freedom to choose which books I wish to read and which I don't.

Here's a list of the Top 100 Banned and Challenged books from 2000-2009. Do any of your favorites make the list? Do any of these surprise you?

1. Harry Potter (series), by J.K. Rowling
2. Alice series, by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
3. The Chocolate War, by Robert Cormier
4. And Tango Makes Three, by Justin Richardson/Peter Parnell
5. Of Mice and Men, by John Steinbeck
6. I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, by Maya Angelou
7. Scary Stories (series), by Alvin Schwartz
8. His Dark Materials (series), by Philip Pullman
9. ttyl; ttfn; l8r g8r (series), by Myracle, Lauren
10. The Perks of Being a Wallflower, by Stephen Chbosky
11. Fallen Angels, by Walter Dean Myers
12. It’s Perfectly Normal, by Robie Harris
13. Captain Underpants (series), by Dav Pilkey
14. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, by Mark Twain
15. The Bluest Eye, by Toni Morrison
16. Forever, by Judy Blume
17. The Color Purple, by Alice Walker
18. Go Ask Alice, by Anonymous
19. Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger
20. King and King, by Linda de Haan
21. To Kill A Mockingbird, by Harper Lee
22. Gossip Girl (series), by Cecily von Ziegesar
23. The Giver, by Lois Lowry
24. In the Night Kitchen, by Maurice Sendak
25. Killing Mr. Griffen, by Lois Duncan
26. Beloved, by Toni Morrison
27. My Brother Sam Is Dead, by James Lincoln Collier
28. Bridge To Terabithia, by Katherine Paterson
29. The Face on the Milk Carton, by Caroline B. Cooney
30. We All Fall Down, by Robert Cormier
31. What My Mother Doesn’t Know, by Sonya Sones
32. Bless Me, Ultima, by Rudolfo Anaya
33. Snow Falling on Cedars, by David Guterson
34. The Earth, My Butt, and Other Big, Round Things, by Carolyn Mackler
35. Angus, Thongs, and Full Frontal Snogging, by Louise Rennison
36. Brave New World, by Aldous Huxley
37. It’s So Amazing, by Robie Harris
38. Arming America, by Michael Bellasiles
39. Kaffir Boy, by Mark Mathabane
40. Life is Funny, by E.R. Frank
41. Whale Talk, by Chris Crutcher
42. The Fighting Ground, by Avi
43. Blubber, by Judy Blume
44. Athletic Shorts, by Chris Crutcher
45. Crazy Lady, by Jane Leslie Conly
46. Slaughterhouse-Five, by Kurt Vonnegut
47. The Adventures of Super Diaper Baby, by George Beard
48. Rainbow Boys, by Alex Sanchez
49. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, by Ken Kesey
50. The Kite Runner, by Khaled Hosseini
51. Daughters of Eve, by Lois Duncan
52. The Great Gilly Hopkins, by Katherine Paterson
53. You Hear Me?, by Betsy Franco
54. The Facts Speak for Themselves, by Brock Cole
55. Summer of My German Soldier, by Bette Green
56. When Dad Killed Mom, by Julius Lester
57. Blood and Chocolate, by Annette Curtis Klause
58. Fat Kid Rules the World, by K.L. Going
59. Olive’s Ocean, by Kevin Henkes
60. Speak, by Laurie Halse Anderson
61. Draw Me A Star, by Eric Carle
62. The Stupids (series), by Harry Allard
63. The Terrorist, by Caroline B. Cooney
64. Mick Harte Was Here, by Barbara Park
65. The Things They Carried, by Tim O’Brien
66. Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry, by Mildred Taylor
67. A Time to Kill, by John Grisham
68. Always Running, by Luis Rodriguez
69. Fahrenheit 451, by Ray Bradbury
70. Harris and Me, by Gary Paulsen
71. Junie B. Jones (series), by Barbara Park
72. Song of Solomon, by Toni Morrison
73. What’s Happening to My Body Book, by Lynda Madaras
74. The Lovely Bones, by Alice Sebold
75. Anastasia (series), by Lois Lowry
76. A Prayer for Owen Meany, by John Irving
77. Crazy: A Novel, by Benjamin Lebert
78. The Joy of Gay Sex, by Dr. Charles Silverstein
79. The Upstairs Room, by Johanna Reiss
80. A Day No Pigs Would Die, by Robert Newton Peck
81. Black Boy, by Richard Wright
82. Deal With It!, by Esther Drill
83. Detour for Emmy, by Marilyn Reynolds
84. So Far From the Bamboo Grove, by Yoko Watkins
85. Staying Fat for Sarah Byrnes, by Chris Crutcher
86. Cut, by Patricia McCormick
87. Tiger Eyes, by Judy Blume
88. The Handmaid’s Tale, by Margaret Atwood
89. Friday Night Lights, by H.G. Bissenger
90. A Wrinkle in Time, by Madeline L’Engle
91. Julie of the Wolves, by Jean Craighead George
92. The Boy Who Lost His Face, by Louis Sachar
93. Bumps in the Night, by Harry Allard
94. Goosebumps (series), by R.L. Stine
95. Shade’s Children, by Garth Nix
96. Grendel, by John Gardner
97. The House of the Spirits, by Isabel Allende
98. I Saw Esau, by Iona Opte
99. Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret, by Judy Blume
100. America: A Novel, by E.R. Frank